Have you ever done an anonymous act that has made you so happy, you feel like you could shoot fully wrapped candy bars out your nose? Yes, it made you that happy?
Once in a while, when I’m not so self absorbed that the only thing I can think about is finding a box of hidden Kraft Mac & Cheese in the pantry, I run across someone somewhere that calls to me. They don’t vocally say anything to me nor do they give me that poor pathetic look. It’s more a spiritual look…you know, the kind where you can read something about them through their eyes. Believe me, I’m not claiming to be a psychic….I so do not believe in those gaudy women who wear more jewelry than all of my ancestors put together. I’m just talking about “that look” that somehow draws you to them.
Hubs and I were on one of our weekend trips when we decided we were hungry. As we drove around, looking for the perfect dinner, we remember Chili’s. We have lots of good memories there, the food is usually decent, and it was easy to get to. As we were eating, I kept watching this lady who I’ll call Ann as she reminded me of my grammy, sitting all by herself, eating a hamburger stacked a mile high with sweet goodness. She’d take a bit and slowly chew, all while looking around at everyone within eyesight.
I’ll be honest….I started to try and figure out her story. I’m pretty sure she was recently widowed. She had that sad look in her eye…the kind where she could have cried had any of us selfish food shovelers dared to take a minute and ask her how she was. It was that kind of look that said she had barely been able to get up and get going that day. That look that she had absolutely no energy to even cook a simple meal for herself. For some reason I was totally drawn to her. I couldn’t take my eyes off her. In fact, at one point, I got teary-eyed watching her. I finally pointed her out to hubs and, after watching a little longer, we decided to buy her dinner anonymously.
When our waitress came to take deliver our food, I whispered to her of our plan but asked her to keep it on the down low. Apparently she has no idea what that means! After Ann was done eating she sat for a while longer still taking in every single sight around her. When she asked for her ticket, the waitress told her it had been taken care of. We were really only about 7 or so feet from her table so we could hear everything. Ann wanted to know who would do that for her after the waitress explained again. I was watching the whole time, although not directly looking as I had chicken strips with a killer honey mustard sauce to devour. Anyway, the dingy waitress then motioned with her eyes to our table….busted! I’ll admit the stinkin’ sauce kept making my eyes water and every time I’d look at Ann, they’d water even more….When she got up to leave, she looked our way and kindly said thank you. It took everything inside me to not jump up and give her a huge hug…one I’d give to my grammy after not seeing her for several months. Yep, it would have been one of “those” hugs…My eyes kept watering, my lip kept quivering, and heart felt incredibly full.
Honestly, I have no idea of her story. I have no idea if our gesture made her feel any better. I have no idea if we overstepped our boundaries. I have no idea….
I do know this. That night, as I was trying to fall asleep, I realized that I need to be more aware. I need to be aware of life past the one-foot barrier I sometimes put around myself. I need to reach out to people and I need to give freely, without any expectations in return. I need to let others feel love like I feel on a daily basis. I need to let people know that someone cares. We never know when that one little act of random kindness could truly save a person, if only for an hour, or help them get through an otherwise unbearable day.
That simple act doesn’t have to be grand. It doesn’t have to be a meal….it could be even a simple act such as letting someone go ahead of you in the grocery line or even a smile and hello. It could be the act of slipping a little sumtin-sumtin in a box at school or wherever you work. It doesn’t have to cost a penny….or it could cost several dollars. It could be anything! The possibilities are endless!
What have you done? Any new ideas? I’m determined to do an act at least once a day….nothing major, nothing to break the bank. Just a little something to make us both feel a bit better about ourselves.
Come on, don't be shy. Let's share our ideas and see what we come up with. Oh, and if you want to do a little act of kindness but don't know who to do it to, let me know. I'll give you my addy, p.o. box, my bank account number and place of employment. I mean, I don't want you to stress about it!
Carry on!
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Ted Fryers....
It's the place to be. I swear I can smell them from I-5 the minute we hit the Oregon state line. I start to feel that giddy feeling in the pit of my stomach like the first time I "met" Ken. I daydream for hours about what great sale I am going to run into. I tell ya, to me, that place is almost as exciting as a jar of Nutella with a big spoon sitting in it, waiting for me to scoop it out and shovel it in my mouth, barely taking time to breathe. Yes, this place is that good. It would be the best if it had Nutella jars attached to each cart, with a spoon, and a bag of tortillas to spread it on. The only thing to make it better? Some gorgeous Prince feeding it to me, while admiring my beauty. Ahhhh....
I will admit, at times, I have a bit of a shopping addiction. It's part in due to living in the middle of pine tree/manzaneta infested clump of land, where in all honesty, my best shopping happens at Ben Franklin or Rite Aid...and, only happens about three times a year out of pure desperation and the need for some obscene plastic bag rustling in my palms of my hands, filled with some cheap tacky item that I wouldn't even give to the local "Save the Garbage Cans" fundraising garage sale. In fact, I usually scan the store, darting in and out of aisles, making sure noone I have tried to impress with my "Suitcasing" or "Cow Tipping" stories from my younger years is within view of my purchases. After all, I am cool to them. Anyway, back to my story....So, while it may seem like I am an addict, I am a selective addict and usually only when we travel. I save my addiction for the road. And, honestly, I think the anticipation of quenching that thirst makes it even better. Thankfully Hubs is very tolerant and values the idea of no temper tantrums so is very helpful in helping me find these sacred places to keep me quiet.
I am pretty sure my mental map could name every store between the Oregon I-5 and somewhere in Washington. I'm being totally serious when I say those stores are drawn to us. Traveling at 65+ miles and hour should prohibit the eyesight from certain buildings but NEVER has it denied us the opportunity to find and enter one of these beloved stores.
Sales. Every single time we enter, sales are everywhere. No matter what I carefully place in my cart, it's on sale. AND the best part? For some crazy reason, they usually take off an extra 10-20%, totally justifying every purchase I've made. I recently picked up a pair of flipflops to add to my collection of summer attire. While they had been seriously slashed in price already, when adding them to my cart, a sweet little lady comes and informs me that they are an additional 20% off. I, without a doubt, know those thongs, errrr flipflops, were meant for me. And, to make it even a better day (Minus the Nutella), I found three more pairs in different styles/colors all within easy reach. I'll tell ya, it was meant to be.
While Hubs gently reminded me that we had come in to buy sheets for our bed since we have to buy them somewhere besides CA....We have an Eastern King not a California King....so, we're banned from buying them in CA. Don't get me started on this one. Anyway, I found sheets that were on sale from $99 down to $68 and some change. Then to add to this madness, there were coupons for another 20% OFF. Are you kidding me? So, to make use of this sale, I picked up two king sets and one queen set. I mean they were almost paying me to take them. I felt very justified in buying the shoes as I had saved so much already. I tell ya, I would live in this store if I could....promoting their greatness 24 hours a day. Oh, and they have a full on grocery store there as well. Ohhhh, I can hardly breath after talking about it.....
So, while I am very vocal about promoting this store...I am, however, hesitant to truthfully identify it. While I want everyone to be able to take advantage of this sale infested wonderland, I'm worried that there will be nothing left for me when I finally make my monthy pilgrimage there. However, I'd probably share my secret for giftcards or cash of which I would dedicate to purchases made in that store. I'm just saying....
Fred Meyers....
You are my favorite place to shop
My dreams of you never stop.
You never fail me on sales
from clothes to pillows to hair gel.
My dream job is to be a Freddy's Greeter,
just wish the toy aisle was a little neater.
I dream about you day and night,
I'm glad you don't sell animals that bite.
Your grocery store is an absolute dream
where you sell everything from prunes to cream.
Socks, face paint, towels, and more....
You truly are my dream store!!
I will admit, at times, I have a bit of a shopping addiction. It's part in due to living in the middle of pine tree/manzaneta infested clump of land, where in all honesty, my best shopping happens at Ben Franklin or Rite Aid...and, only happens about three times a year out of pure desperation and the need for some obscene plastic bag rustling in my palms of my hands, filled with some cheap tacky item that I wouldn't even give to the local "Save the Garbage Cans" fundraising garage sale. In fact, I usually scan the store, darting in and out of aisles, making sure noone I have tried to impress with my "Suitcasing" or "Cow Tipping" stories from my younger years is within view of my purchases. After all, I am cool to them. Anyway, back to my story....So, while it may seem like I am an addict, I am a selective addict and usually only when we travel. I save my addiction for the road. And, honestly, I think the anticipation of quenching that thirst makes it even better. Thankfully Hubs is very tolerant and values the idea of no temper tantrums so is very helpful in helping me find these sacred places to keep me quiet.
I am pretty sure my mental map could name every store between the Oregon I-5 and somewhere in Washington. I'm being totally serious when I say those stores are drawn to us. Traveling at 65+ miles and hour should prohibit the eyesight from certain buildings but NEVER has it denied us the opportunity to find and enter one of these beloved stores.
Sales. Every single time we enter, sales are everywhere. No matter what I carefully place in my cart, it's on sale. AND the best part? For some crazy reason, they usually take off an extra 10-20%, totally justifying every purchase I've made. I recently picked up a pair of flipflops to add to my collection of summer attire. While they had been seriously slashed in price already, when adding them to my cart, a sweet little lady comes and informs me that they are an additional 20% off. I, without a doubt, know those thongs, errrr flipflops, were meant for me. And, to make it even a better day (Minus the Nutella), I found three more pairs in different styles/colors all within easy reach. I'll tell ya, it was meant to be.
While Hubs gently reminded me that we had come in to buy sheets for our bed since we have to buy them somewhere besides CA....We have an Eastern King not a California King....so, we're banned from buying them in CA. Don't get me started on this one. Anyway, I found sheets that were on sale from $99 down to $68 and some change. Then to add to this madness, there were coupons for another 20% OFF. Are you kidding me? So, to make use of this sale, I picked up two king sets and one queen set. I mean they were almost paying me to take them. I felt very justified in buying the shoes as I had saved so much already. I tell ya, I would live in this store if I could....promoting their greatness 24 hours a day. Oh, and they have a full on grocery store there as well. Ohhhh, I can hardly breath after talking about it.....
So, while I am very vocal about promoting this store...I am, however, hesitant to truthfully identify it. While I want everyone to be able to take advantage of this sale infested wonderland, I'm worried that there will be nothing left for me when I finally make my monthy pilgrimage there. However, I'd probably share my secret for giftcards or cash of which I would dedicate to purchases made in that store. I'm just saying....
Fred Meyers....
You are my favorite place to shop
My dreams of you never stop.
You never fail me on sales
from clothes to pillows to hair gel.
My dream job is to be a Freddy's Greeter,
just wish the toy aisle was a little neater.
I dream about you day and night,
I'm glad you don't sell animals that bite.
Your grocery store is an absolute dream
where you sell everything from prunes to cream.
Socks, face paint, towels, and more....
You truly are my dream store!!
Monday, August 02, 2010
Tolerance....that's what it's all about
I have struggled with this blog. Do I go serious? Do I go the humorous route? Do I write the truth? Do I make up funny stories? Do I include my family without their consent? What do I do?
I have realized that some days are more serious than others. There are days where, as hard as I try, I couldn’t squeeze a lick of juice out of an overripe orange if my life depended upon it. Those are the days where I am blank. Nothing computes. Nothing comes to mind about what to write. Nothing in my head makes me laugh. Nothing in my head makes sense. Some days I am just off.
I’m not sure why some days are that way. Maybe something on t.v. has rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I didn’t get enough sleep. Maybe my husband put too much water in the ice tea pitcher. Maybe the shirt I wanted to wear had a spot on it. Who really knows?
However, there are times when a subject pops into my head and I cannot shake it. I think about if for days. Some subjects are not ones I care to write about….and others I can’t find the words to put into writing. I have a million thoughts in this head of mine but some of them just don’t make any sense by the time they get to my mouth or the tips of my fingers. Some thoughts stay and as time goes on, the thoughts become more vivid and more concrete. Bullying is one of those thoughts.
Bullying has been on my mind for days if not weeks. You see, bullying hits very close to home for me. I was never the target of daily or constant bullying but someone I love was. In fact, bullying almost cost this person their life. And, every singe day, she struggles because of words or actions that happened over 20 years ago. Bullying is a life sentence.
Imagine going to school every.single.day knowing that you will be the target of someone in some hallway of the one place that is supposed to keep you safe. Imagine waking up every morning knowing that you would be that target. Imagine dreading school with every single thing that you have and still having to go as no one knew what you were going through. Imagine the people that you thought or hoped were your friends were the ones doing some of the bullying. And, because they were supposed to be your friends, that bullying would be of the worst form possible.
There are nights that I wake up sad or mad or sick to my stomach. I was one of the few people that should have protected her and I didn’t. I should have been the one to stick up for her, to stand up and speak for her when she couldn’t. And, if that didn’t work, I should have been the one to raise my fist and make sure that not another demeaning word could come out of that person’s mouth.
Why was she picked to be the daily target for some? Was it her hair color? Was it due to an overactive skin condition, which like a lot of teenagers, caused acne? Was it due to her name? Was it because she walked the halls with her head hung down, scared to look anyone in the eyes? Was it because she was already had a low self esteem? What was it because of?
For years none of us knew how bad it was. It finally took a period in her life, she almost ending everything, for us to realize how bad it really was. Even then, we still really didn’t know the depth of it. I doubt we still do. Every once in while, a little more of the picture will be revealed, and when it is, I feel like I’ve been socked in the gut once again. I’ll probably never know how bad it really was as time does seem to heal some things. However, I do know that it was bad. It was bad enough that, to this day, it still haunts her. It has caused her to not have a lot of friends, to settle for things she wouldn’t have thought to settle for at one time, to question motives of anything and everyone, and to not have a positive self image.
For me, one of the saddest moments of truth was realizing that young ladies, who were supposed to be her friends, her church mates, her cheerleaders, were some of the worst torturers of all times. I still tear up at the thought of how mean they were to her, how hard she tried to fit in, and how much harder that made them work at making her feel worthless. I often wonder if they even remember their words and their actions…because she sure does. Do they have any idea the pain they caused? Do they feel guilty about it? Do they even remember being that cruel? Mostly, are they still that cruel? Still so self centered that they will do whatever it takes to make themselves feel better? Do they have any idea???
I have, at times, wanted to write them, to scold them, to yell at them, to let them know that bullying is a life sentence for some and that they were the ones who personally handed that sentence to her.. I have wanted to tell them that I hope they never have to live this life sentence, if not themselves, but have to watch their children suffer through it. I have wanted to tell them that the things they said and did or didn’t do still haunt her to this day. Those things still make it almost impossible for her to rise in the morning or to make it through some days. Those things still make it hard for her to look in the mirror and realize that she is worth something and that she is beautiful. Those things, those words, those actions, still are etched in her mind like it was yesterday.
More than anything, I wish that a simple “I am sorry” could fix the hurt, the pain, the memories of years ago. However, I’m very aware that is not the case. I’m very aware that those words would probably mean nothing to her. If nothing else, I hope that they have learned somehow the pain they have caused her. I hope that they have realized you cannot treat someone like that and not have it make a lasting impression. I hope they have realized what they have done and that they have truly felt remorse and guilt for what they have done. I hope they have somehow forgiven themselves….
She will be fine. She will raise her family the best she can. She will be a wonderful mother who, without a doubt, will teach her children that tolerance is the only acceptable way to live with people. She will learn to love herself the best way she knows how. She will learn that she is loved. And hopefully, she will never hear those words or see those actions again. And, hopefully she will only be surrounded by kind, tolerant, and loving people.
If you never teach your children anything else ….please teach your children that tolerance is a must. Help them realize that, while they may only be bullying a child in grade school, that will most certainly help shape who that little person becomes. Teach them that even if it doesn’t seem bad to us, we have no idea how hurtful and damaging those words or actions can become. Teach them that, because of bullying, some young people have felt the only way to get relief from that unbearable pain was to end their lives. Would you want your child to be responsible for that ending?
Unfortunately, as young children, we don’t have the ability to see what our actions will become at a later date. We don’t realize how permanent something can become. It’s our job to make sure children know. Even if we don’t have our own children, it is still our job to help mold these children into caring, tolerant, and loving individuals. It is our job.
This new school year is fast upon us. As it approaches, I have decided to make some changes within myself. I will, no matter what the situation, approach and confront every form of bullying I see. I will approach the child who is being bullied and I will listen to them. I want them to know they are important and they are loved. I want them to know that they are worth something. I want them to know those words or actions are simply not true. There have been times where I have turned the other cheek when I knew better. I wonder what I could have prevented? I will also approach the bullier. I will confront them on their actions and let them know that is not accepted. I will do everything in my power to make sure that not one more child has to grow up with a life sentence.
Tolerance…that is what it is all about.
I have realized that some days are more serious than others. There are days where, as hard as I try, I couldn’t squeeze a lick of juice out of an overripe orange if my life depended upon it. Those are the days where I am blank. Nothing computes. Nothing comes to mind about what to write. Nothing in my head makes me laugh. Nothing in my head makes sense. Some days I am just off.
I’m not sure why some days are that way. Maybe something on t.v. has rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I didn’t get enough sleep. Maybe my husband put too much water in the ice tea pitcher. Maybe the shirt I wanted to wear had a spot on it. Who really knows?
However, there are times when a subject pops into my head and I cannot shake it. I think about if for days. Some subjects are not ones I care to write about….and others I can’t find the words to put into writing. I have a million thoughts in this head of mine but some of them just don’t make any sense by the time they get to my mouth or the tips of my fingers. Some thoughts stay and as time goes on, the thoughts become more vivid and more concrete. Bullying is one of those thoughts.
Bullying has been on my mind for days if not weeks. You see, bullying hits very close to home for me. I was never the target of daily or constant bullying but someone I love was. In fact, bullying almost cost this person their life. And, every singe day, she struggles because of words or actions that happened over 20 years ago. Bullying is a life sentence.
Imagine going to school every.single.day knowing that you will be the target of someone in some hallway of the one place that is supposed to keep you safe. Imagine waking up every morning knowing that you would be that target. Imagine dreading school with every single thing that you have and still having to go as no one knew what you were going through. Imagine the people that you thought or hoped were your friends were the ones doing some of the bullying. And, because they were supposed to be your friends, that bullying would be of the worst form possible.
There are nights that I wake up sad or mad or sick to my stomach. I was one of the few people that should have protected her and I didn’t. I should have been the one to stick up for her, to stand up and speak for her when she couldn’t. And, if that didn’t work, I should have been the one to raise my fist and make sure that not another demeaning word could come out of that person’s mouth.
Why was she picked to be the daily target for some? Was it her hair color? Was it due to an overactive skin condition, which like a lot of teenagers, caused acne? Was it due to her name? Was it because she walked the halls with her head hung down, scared to look anyone in the eyes? Was it because she was already had a low self esteem? What was it because of?
For years none of us knew how bad it was. It finally took a period in her life, she almost ending everything, for us to realize how bad it really was. Even then, we still really didn’t know the depth of it. I doubt we still do. Every once in while, a little more of the picture will be revealed, and when it is, I feel like I’ve been socked in the gut once again. I’ll probably never know how bad it really was as time does seem to heal some things. However, I do know that it was bad. It was bad enough that, to this day, it still haunts her. It has caused her to not have a lot of friends, to settle for things she wouldn’t have thought to settle for at one time, to question motives of anything and everyone, and to not have a positive self image.
For me, one of the saddest moments of truth was realizing that young ladies, who were supposed to be her friends, her church mates, her cheerleaders, were some of the worst torturers of all times. I still tear up at the thought of how mean they were to her, how hard she tried to fit in, and how much harder that made them work at making her feel worthless. I often wonder if they even remember their words and their actions…because she sure does. Do they have any idea the pain they caused? Do they feel guilty about it? Do they even remember being that cruel? Mostly, are they still that cruel? Still so self centered that they will do whatever it takes to make themselves feel better? Do they have any idea???
I have, at times, wanted to write them, to scold them, to yell at them, to let them know that bullying is a life sentence for some and that they were the ones who personally handed that sentence to her.. I have wanted to tell them that I hope they never have to live this life sentence, if not themselves, but have to watch their children suffer through it. I have wanted to tell them that the things they said and did or didn’t do still haunt her to this day. Those things still make it almost impossible for her to rise in the morning or to make it through some days. Those things still make it hard for her to look in the mirror and realize that she is worth something and that she is beautiful. Those things, those words, those actions, still are etched in her mind like it was yesterday.
More than anything, I wish that a simple “I am sorry” could fix the hurt, the pain, the memories of years ago. However, I’m very aware that is not the case. I’m very aware that those words would probably mean nothing to her. If nothing else, I hope that they have learned somehow the pain they have caused her. I hope that they have realized you cannot treat someone like that and not have it make a lasting impression. I hope they have realized what they have done and that they have truly felt remorse and guilt for what they have done. I hope they have somehow forgiven themselves….
She will be fine. She will raise her family the best she can. She will be a wonderful mother who, without a doubt, will teach her children that tolerance is the only acceptable way to live with people. She will learn to love herself the best way she knows how. She will learn that she is loved. And hopefully, she will never hear those words or see those actions again. And, hopefully she will only be surrounded by kind, tolerant, and loving people.
If you never teach your children anything else ….please teach your children that tolerance is a must. Help them realize that, while they may only be bullying a child in grade school, that will most certainly help shape who that little person becomes. Teach them that even if it doesn’t seem bad to us, we have no idea how hurtful and damaging those words or actions can become. Teach them that, because of bullying, some young people have felt the only way to get relief from that unbearable pain was to end their lives. Would you want your child to be responsible for that ending?
Unfortunately, as young children, we don’t have the ability to see what our actions will become at a later date. We don’t realize how permanent something can become. It’s our job to make sure children know. Even if we don’t have our own children, it is still our job to help mold these children into caring, tolerant, and loving individuals. It is our job.
This new school year is fast upon us. As it approaches, I have decided to make some changes within myself. I will, no matter what the situation, approach and confront every form of bullying I see. I will approach the child who is being bullied and I will listen to them. I want them to know they are important and they are loved. I want them to know that they are worth something. I want them to know those words or actions are simply not true. There have been times where I have turned the other cheek when I knew better. I wonder what I could have prevented? I will also approach the bullier. I will confront them on their actions and let them know that is not accepted. I will do everything in my power to make sure that not one more child has to grow up with a life sentence.
Tolerance…that is what it is all about.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Jetty Walking....
Summer....it has finally arrived. With it, comes our annual pilgrimage to our favorite place....the place where, as we are driving, I physically feel the stress and worries leave my body as we drive, mile by mile, closer. The place that we spend with friends who are quickly becoming more like family to us. The friends who we mesh so well with. We find amusement in the exact same things....the same foods, the same sights, the same people. And the laughing...nonstop....to me, is the most important thing.
Top ten highlights are as follows:
1. Playing games with everyone in the late hours. Even though hubs knows he's going to get slaughtered, he still willingly plays each and every night with us. There is noone else I'd rather have at the sea with me....than he. Yes, I do poetry on the side too....
2. Ken and I introducing everyone to the Kite Festival that we happened to stumble upon last year. It was priceless watching them watch the kites being flow to music, as we already knew how great the show was. It got even better, with each passing day, as the kite festival was the talk of the trip. Yep, I think we've started another annual tradition with them....and yes, in true Lorinda fashion, I am the only one that got sunburned. And who gets sunburned on the Oregon Coast anyway? How embarrassing....
3. Watching Connor, the young man with Epilepsy, who performed on America's Got Talent this season, do a kite routine. I was absolutely touched and honored to watch him perform. Epilepsy is very close to my heart as I have a family member who has struggled with seizures. Connor mentioned, while performing on TV, that flying kites was the one time he wouldn't suffer from seizures. I was so moved by his story and his ability to make the his kite dance.
43. Taking a drive to watch the sunset over the water and walking on the beach. Amy somehow convincing me that it was bad luck to not watch the sun go down completely...once we started watching....thus, the two steps sideways to the right and one step back beach dance came alive. Fun for us...entertaining for others.
5. Heading to the Jetty to watch the Coast Guard Boat hanging in the water. Once we got there, the Coast Guard Helicopter started flying back and forth. In true Wike fashion, we were lucky enough to watch the Coast Guard Chopper hover over the water and practice rescue manuevers in the dark for at least 40 minutes. It was so exciting to watch.....another great topic of conversation for hours. I got some cool pics too!
6. Having spent so much time in Bandon, we are becoming very familiar with some of the stores and employees. I was so excited to walk in and talk to one gal who obviously remembered me...only to have her refer to me as Louise. Seriously, Louise? Do I look like a Louise? It literally took my breath away....I wasn't sure what to do. So, in true Lorinda fashion, I smiled and talked and talked....so flustered by the whole "Louise" situation. I quietly left a few minutes later, feeling somewhat deflated. Again, seriously, Louise? My shopping days in that store may truly be over....well, at least until next summer.
7. Learning the whole "Light a Match" trick after you're done doing your thang in the bathroom. Never knew...but now I do and it's my favorite new trick. SO, when you've come to the Wikes and you see a box of matches sitting on top of the poopster, you know what to do with them and you'd better use them...I'm just saying it makes life a bit more pleasant for all others involved! Wahhooooeeeyyy!!
8. Yoo Hoo! For those of you who truly know me, you know this is my signature "Hello," mostly from the window of a moving car. I get waves, I get strange looks, but mostly I get this strange celebrity satisfaction....I luv it a lot!
9. Gobs of Seafood...fresh seafood...seafood, seafood, seafood. I'm no stranger to fresh seafood. It absolutely is one of my favorite foods. As most know, I have this massive fear of gristle and viens in most meats. I've never found either in seafood and love the fact that I can eat it without having to disect it first. Seafood, it's whats for dinner!!!
10. Bandon-By-the-Sea, Oregon....my favorite place to be. I think everyone should have to experience this little coastal town. We now know lots of local spots, most of which I'll share with you if you kindly ask. I know where the good shopping is. I know the best seafood eats. I know the best beaches. I know the best entertainment. But mostly, I know how to have a good time here....Hubs and friends are all that are needed. Oh, and a reliable vehicle to get you down to the beach or jetty.....for a good walk and sunset. That's what it's all about.
Yes, Bandon, Oregon...It should be a requirement for everyone before they die. The place is absolutely beautiful.
Top ten highlights are as follows:
1. Playing games with everyone in the late hours. Even though hubs knows he's going to get slaughtered, he still willingly plays each and every night with us. There is noone else I'd rather have at the sea with me....than he. Yes, I do poetry on the side too....
2. Ken and I introducing everyone to the Kite Festival that we happened to stumble upon last year. It was priceless watching them watch the kites being flow to music, as we already knew how great the show was. It got even better, with each passing day, as the kite festival was the talk of the trip. Yep, I think we've started another annual tradition with them....and yes, in true Lorinda fashion, I am the only one that got sunburned. And who gets sunburned on the Oregon Coast anyway? How embarrassing....
3. Watching Connor, the young man with Epilepsy, who performed on America's Got Talent this season, do a kite routine. I was absolutely touched and honored to watch him perform. Epilepsy is very close to my heart as I have a family member who has struggled with seizures. Connor mentioned, while performing on TV, that flying kites was the one time he wouldn't suffer from seizures. I was so moved by his story and his ability to make the his kite dance.
43. Taking a drive to watch the sunset over the water and walking on the beach. Amy somehow convincing me that it was bad luck to not watch the sun go down completely...once we started watching....thus, the two steps sideways to the right and one step back beach dance came alive. Fun for us...entertaining for others.
5. Heading to the Jetty to watch the Coast Guard Boat hanging in the water. Once we got there, the Coast Guard Helicopter started flying back and forth. In true Wike fashion, we were lucky enough to watch the Coast Guard Chopper hover over the water and practice rescue manuevers in the dark for at least 40 minutes. It was so exciting to watch.....another great topic of conversation for hours. I got some cool pics too!
6. Having spent so much time in Bandon, we are becoming very familiar with some of the stores and employees. I was so excited to walk in and talk to one gal who obviously remembered me...only to have her refer to me as Louise. Seriously, Louise? Do I look like a Louise? It literally took my breath away....I wasn't sure what to do. So, in true Lorinda fashion, I smiled and talked and talked....so flustered by the whole "Louise" situation. I quietly left a few minutes later, feeling somewhat deflated. Again, seriously, Louise? My shopping days in that store may truly be over....well, at least until next summer.
7. Learning the whole "Light a Match" trick after you're done doing your thang in the bathroom. Never knew...but now I do and it's my favorite new trick. SO, when you've come to the Wikes and you see a box of matches sitting on top of the poopster, you know what to do with them and you'd better use them...I'm just saying it makes life a bit more pleasant for all others involved! Wahhooooeeeyyy!!
8. Yoo Hoo! For those of you who truly know me, you know this is my signature "Hello," mostly from the window of a moving car. I get waves, I get strange looks, but mostly I get this strange celebrity satisfaction....I luv it a lot!
9. Gobs of Seafood...fresh seafood...seafood, seafood, seafood. I'm no stranger to fresh seafood. It absolutely is one of my favorite foods. As most know, I have this massive fear of gristle and viens in most meats. I've never found either in seafood and love the fact that I can eat it without having to disect it first. Seafood, it's whats for dinner!!!
10. Bandon-By-the-Sea, Oregon....my favorite place to be. I think everyone should have to experience this little coastal town. We now know lots of local spots, most of which I'll share with you if you kindly ask. I know where the good shopping is. I know the best seafood eats. I know the best beaches. I know the best entertainment. But mostly, I know how to have a good time here....Hubs and friends are all that are needed. Oh, and a reliable vehicle to get you down to the beach or jetty.....for a good walk and sunset. That's what it's all about.
Yes, Bandon, Oregon...It should be a requirement for everyone before they die. The place is absolutely beautiful.
Saturday, May 09, 2009
Mother's Day
Mother's Day is, without doubt, the hardest, most stressful, emotional, depressing, and most dreaded holiday of each and every year for me. It brings up feelings that I try all year to bury. Unfortunately for me, these feelings start in early April and it usually takes me a few days or weeks to figure out what my heart and mind are struggling to deal with. Then, without warning, in some safe place, it hits me that my most dreaded and feared holiday is coming, regardless of whether I want it to or not.
Most know that I was adopted at six weeks old. I was blessed with a wonderful, supportive family who has done nothing but stand beside me, build me up, and help me when I have fallen. My Mom is one of my best friends and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about her and feeled truly blessed to have her in my life.
My birthmother is....just that. A woman who gave birth to me. For years I have struggled with this, even after finding and having the chance to reunite with her. For her, it was a dream come true. For me, it has been a very different path. A path that I didn't think I could or would ever take. A path that opened up feelings and I didn't want to have to ever deal with. A path of mass confusion. A path that, at times, seems to push me backwards instead of flinging me forward.
And, while my birthmother is just "that"....there is also something more I feel for her. However, even as I approach middle age, I still can't figure out her place in my life. I struggle, almost daily, to try and find the empty space she fits in my uncompleted puzzle sitting on my table...the table I pass by often. I have great love for her but it's a love I've never felt before. It's a feeling that I haven't quite figured out where it belongs.
First, please know that I will be forever grateful for the hard and painful decision my birthmother made to give me up to be raised by a true, loving family. In no way have I ever wanted to hurt her or exploit her. She did the best she could with what she had . I know that and I am blessed beyond measure. I also know the pain she was in day by day, year by year, and possibly every second. I know that for her, life has never been easy. I know that.
Mother's Day comes every single year. Growing up, I used to wonder if my birthmom was thinking, worrying, caring about me at all on that day. I used to feel her pain, even before I ever knew her, and felt guilty that I was honoring someone else on Mother's Day. It was such a wierd feeling for me, knowing that I should in no way feel guilty for something I had no control over. But, in all reality, I was feeling that pain inside and it was eating at me ever so slowly. This pain caused me to cry, act out, and become horribly depressed. However, it was a pain that I have hidden so deep inside that I have never been able to share it with anyone.
After finding my birthmother, the pain was still there but it took on another role. The pain then threw itself towards my half brothers. It was horrible guilt for having a wonderful, filled life with a very normal, loving, and caring family. My half brothers, on the other hand, didn't lead such a privelged life. Their life was filled with numerous houses and towns, people coming and going, financial uncertainties, and the list could go on and on....
I am now working on not carrying that guilt that we all know is in no way my fault. I am sure that there will always be a part of me that will carry some feelings of guilt and regret but it is something that is way beyond my control, as much as I try to control it. It is something that I have to hand to a higher power, something that I have to try and understand, something that I have to accept for what it is and go on. It is a part of me and no matter how hard I try to convince myself that it isn't, it will forever be.....
Today I want to honor my Mom. I could write for weeks about the things she is, about the people that look up to her, about the people she has touched, about the children she has taught, about the values she has passed on, about the traditions she has started for her family, etc. etc. etc.
I could go on to eternity about her. If you named one thing that a mother should be, I can guarantee that my mother has already been it. She is amazing.
Never once have I told my Mom how Mother's Day has affected me. I didn't want her carrying that burden as all know a mother would. I didn't want this one special day to be taken away from her. I didn't want her to ever feel any sort of guilt for a day that was given to her. I never wanted her to see or feel my pain, especially on her day. I just never wanted her to know.
Now at 41 years old, I guess it's time to take charge and decide what and how I am going to feel.
Most know that I was adopted at six weeks old. I was blessed with a wonderful, supportive family who has done nothing but stand beside me, build me up, and help me when I have fallen. My Mom is one of my best friends and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about her and feeled truly blessed to have her in my life.
My birthmother is....just that. A woman who gave birth to me. For years I have struggled with this, even after finding and having the chance to reunite with her. For her, it was a dream come true. For me, it has been a very different path. A path that I didn't think I could or would ever take. A path that opened up feelings and I didn't want to have to ever deal with. A path of mass confusion. A path that, at times, seems to push me backwards instead of flinging me forward.
And, while my birthmother is just "that"....there is also something more I feel for her. However, even as I approach middle age, I still can't figure out her place in my life. I struggle, almost daily, to try and find the empty space she fits in my uncompleted puzzle sitting on my table...the table I pass by often. I have great love for her but it's a love I've never felt before. It's a feeling that I haven't quite figured out where it belongs.
First, please know that I will be forever grateful for the hard and painful decision my birthmother made to give me up to be raised by a true, loving family. In no way have I ever wanted to hurt her or exploit her. She did the best she could with what she had . I know that and I am blessed beyond measure. I also know the pain she was in day by day, year by year, and possibly every second. I know that for her, life has never been easy. I know that.
Mother's Day comes every single year. Growing up, I used to wonder if my birthmom was thinking, worrying, caring about me at all on that day. I used to feel her pain, even before I ever knew her, and felt guilty that I was honoring someone else on Mother's Day. It was such a wierd feeling for me, knowing that I should in no way feel guilty for something I had no control over. But, in all reality, I was feeling that pain inside and it was eating at me ever so slowly. This pain caused me to cry, act out, and become horribly depressed. However, it was a pain that I have hidden so deep inside that I have never been able to share it with anyone.
After finding my birthmother, the pain was still there but it took on another role. The pain then threw itself towards my half brothers. It was horrible guilt for having a wonderful, filled life with a very normal, loving, and caring family. My half brothers, on the other hand, didn't lead such a privelged life. Their life was filled with numerous houses and towns, people coming and going, financial uncertainties, and the list could go on and on....
I am now working on not carrying that guilt that we all know is in no way my fault. I am sure that there will always be a part of me that will carry some feelings of guilt and regret but it is something that is way beyond my control, as much as I try to control it. It is something that I have to hand to a higher power, something that I have to try and understand, something that I have to accept for what it is and go on. It is a part of me and no matter how hard I try to convince myself that it isn't, it will forever be.....
Today I want to honor my Mom. I could write for weeks about the things she is, about the people that look up to her, about the people she has touched, about the children she has taught, about the values she has passed on, about the traditions she has started for her family, etc. etc. etc.
I could go on to eternity about her. If you named one thing that a mother should be, I can guarantee that my mother has already been it. She is amazing.
Never once have I told my Mom how Mother's Day has affected me. I didn't want her carrying that burden as all know a mother would. I didn't want this one special day to be taken away from her. I didn't want her to ever feel any sort of guilt for a day that was given to her. I never wanted her to see or feel my pain, especially on her day. I just never wanted her to know.
Now at 41 years old, I guess it's time to take charge and decide what and how I am going to feel.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
It’s a Rare Thing….
I looked up rare in the dictionary this morning to find that it is defined as: unusually fine, excellent, splendid, seldom met with.
This Christmas was spent with my side of the family in Eastern Oregon. My parents are big on traditions and started many fine ones when we were little. I think my favorite, as well as my siblings, is our Christmas Eve Fondue Feast. While I was making plans for our few days at home, I talked with my best friend, who is a rare one indeed (more on this later). She mentioned (actually hinted pretty darn hard!) that she would be willing to bring her family and come spend Christmas Eve with us, and after the ok from my mom (which I knew wouldn’t be a problem), the plan was set in place.
This big feast is a big deal in our family! We talk for months about what we will be eating (devouring is more like it but I don’t want you to think we are barbaric or anything) and then the day of our celebration, we head to town (Yes, we have to go to another town to stock up as the little grocery store here doesn’t have much in the way exotic foods…) to buy the supplies. Our main entry is the fondue, which consists of a selection of fish, shrimp, and marinated steak dipped in a batter and deep fried in hot oil in the fondue pots. Also on the table is a spread of meats and cheeses, fruits, veggies and chips with dip, cheese ball and crackers, etc. This meal takes several hours to prepare and set up, followed by a good hour or so of eating and not much talking.
It meant so much to me to have my family as well as my best bud share this special evening with us. Memories are always made when we are all together and you can’t ever replace or make those up.
Anyway, back to my RARE entry: Friendship is something that I am very passionate about. I don’t take it lightly and I am 100% devoted to my friends, as well as their families. Best Friends, I realize, are very hard and RARE to come by. And even harder to keep, especially when miles (distances we live apart from each other) and years (how long we have been BF’s) are between you. T and I have been best of friends since about the 8th grade, when she moved to my hometown. Strangely our personalities are very similar and if you are on the receiving end of them, they can be deadly for you. We are very passionate about our likes and interests and our minds go a hundred miles an hour, usually in the same direction. We are tuned into each other and can usually finish each others sentences and thoughts (when the other can get a word in..).
We have been through it all together: school, deaths of very loved grandparents, nannies in New York, boyfriends, marriages, divorce, children, infertility issues, very personal issues, and finally contentment—where we both seem to be now with our lives, marriages, family, etc.
Our friendship is RARE in that it is going on 25+ years and is stronger than ever. We can go a week or two without talking (due to busy lives), pick up the phone and start where we left off last time, both of us fighting to get a word in. We can usually sense when one needs to talk and the phone will ring with a very lengthy conversation to follow. We have talked and cried together on the phone for hours and usually still have more to say. I realize that most friendships do not last this long and I do not take this lightly or take it for granted. I know I am blessed to have her in my life and I know that we will be friends until the end. This friendship is RARE, I know….
I remember shortly after got I married and moved to CA to be with the love of my life, I became incredibly homesick. I was laying in bed, crying uncontrollably with my husband by my side, who was trying to console me the best he could. It was late--10:30 or so and the phone rang. It was T, calling to say hi. I remember my DH handing me the phone with tears in his eyes, and I put the phone to my ear, crying so hard I couldn’t talk. T talked to me and cried with me and let me know that even though we were miles apart, she was still there for me. She has no idea how much that helped me get through the next day, week, month, and year. It was amazing that she would know that at that exact minute I needed her phone call more than anything in the whole wide world....but that is our friendship for you. There is no way to describe the closeness or bond that we share. We know we are blessed and that this friendship is a RARE one indeed.
We joke that when we are old and widowed we will live side by side, somewhere. Our daily schedule will include sitting on the front porch, rocking in our rocking chairs, making fun of the people walking by (Don’t laugh, you’ve probably been the butt of one or more of our laughs-he he he!), sipping ice tea, and sharing teeth if eating is involved (which I am sure will be with T. around). While we joke about this, I am sure there is probably going to be some truth to it as well. And, to be honest, there is nothing in the world that I would rather do than spend my days making fun of people and hanging with my best friend…..
RARE indeed!!
This Christmas was spent with my side of the family in Eastern Oregon. My parents are big on traditions and started many fine ones when we were little. I think my favorite, as well as my siblings, is our Christmas Eve Fondue Feast. While I was making plans for our few days at home, I talked with my best friend, who is a rare one indeed (more on this later). She mentioned (actually hinted pretty darn hard!) that she would be willing to bring her family and come spend Christmas Eve with us, and after the ok from my mom (which I knew wouldn’t be a problem), the plan was set in place.
This big feast is a big deal in our family! We talk for months about what we will be eating (devouring is more like it but I don’t want you to think we are barbaric or anything) and then the day of our celebration, we head to town (Yes, we have to go to another town to stock up as the little grocery store here doesn’t have much in the way exotic foods…) to buy the supplies. Our main entry is the fondue, which consists of a selection of fish, shrimp, and marinated steak dipped in a batter and deep fried in hot oil in the fondue pots. Also on the table is a spread of meats and cheeses, fruits, veggies and chips with dip, cheese ball and crackers, etc. This meal takes several hours to prepare and set up, followed by a good hour or so of eating and not much talking.
It meant so much to me to have my family as well as my best bud share this special evening with us. Memories are always made when we are all together and you can’t ever replace or make those up.
Anyway, back to my RARE entry: Friendship is something that I am very passionate about. I don’t take it lightly and I am 100% devoted to my friends, as well as their families. Best Friends, I realize, are very hard and RARE to come by. And even harder to keep, especially when miles (distances we live apart from each other) and years (how long we have been BF’s) are between you. T and I have been best of friends since about the 8th grade, when she moved to my hometown. Strangely our personalities are very similar and if you are on the receiving end of them, they can be deadly for you. We are very passionate about our likes and interests and our minds go a hundred miles an hour, usually in the same direction. We are tuned into each other and can usually finish each others sentences and thoughts (when the other can get a word in..).
We have been through it all together: school, deaths of very loved grandparents, nannies in New York, boyfriends, marriages, divorce, children, infertility issues, very personal issues, and finally contentment—where we both seem to be now with our lives, marriages, family, etc.
Our friendship is RARE in that it is going on 25+ years and is stronger than ever. We can go a week or two without talking (due to busy lives), pick up the phone and start where we left off last time, both of us fighting to get a word in. We can usually sense when one needs to talk and the phone will ring with a very lengthy conversation to follow. We have talked and cried together on the phone for hours and usually still have more to say. I realize that most friendships do not last this long and I do not take this lightly or take it for granted. I know I am blessed to have her in my life and I know that we will be friends until the end. This friendship is RARE, I know….
I remember shortly after got I married and moved to CA to be with the love of my life, I became incredibly homesick. I was laying in bed, crying uncontrollably with my husband by my side, who was trying to console me the best he could. It was late--10:30 or so and the phone rang. It was T, calling to say hi. I remember my DH handing me the phone with tears in his eyes, and I put the phone to my ear, crying so hard I couldn’t talk. T talked to me and cried with me and let me know that even though we were miles apart, she was still there for me. She has no idea how much that helped me get through the next day, week, month, and year. It was amazing that she would know that at that exact minute I needed her phone call more than anything in the whole wide world....but that is our friendship for you. There is no way to describe the closeness or bond that we share. We know we are blessed and that this friendship is a RARE one indeed.
We joke that when we are old and widowed we will live side by side, somewhere. Our daily schedule will include sitting on the front porch, rocking in our rocking chairs, making fun of the people walking by (Don’t laugh, you’ve probably been the butt of one or more of our laughs-he he he!), sipping ice tea, and sharing teeth if eating is involved (which I am sure will be with T. around). While we joke about this, I am sure there is probably going to be some truth to it as well. And, to be honest, there is nothing in the world that I would rather do than spend my days making fun of people and hanging with my best friend…..
RARE indeed!!
Monday, December 29, 2008
Things I've done....
Okay so this list is going around in my the email world and I thought I would give it a go. Feel free to do the same! Things I have done are highlighted in purple. I have a lot more living to do!!
1. Started your own blog--DUH, you're reading it right now!
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii--Yep, last October with Ma, Pa, and DH
5. Watched a meteor shower--Yep, just last summer. Talk about awesome!
6. Given more than you can afford to charity--No, but this is on my bucket list!
7. Been to Disneyland--several times, the last being about 11 yrs ago
8. Climbed a mountain--Yes, and for the life of me can't figure out why. It was definitely not something I enjoyed.
9. Held a praying mantis--Yep, but not really on purpose. It landed on my shoulder and while trying to get it off of me, I had to grab it. I guess you could call that holding??
10. Sang a solo---Ha, ha, ha...funny....have you heard me sing? Didn't think so...
11. Bungee jumped---NOPE, stupid, stupid stupid idea...
12. Visited Paris--The city of love will see me one of these days though...
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea--Who in their right mind would do this? Lightning bolts vs. steel boat and people is not a good thing...
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child--Oh man, this is my dream! Hopefully soon...
16. Had food poisoning--Yes and I don't want to talk about it....
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty...Yes, when I was a nanny in NY
18. Grown your own vegetables--with my parents when I was a wee one
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked--stupid, just plain stupid
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill---Uh yes, and I got caught...I do however, once in awhile take a mental health day...doesn't everyone???
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping...you mean chunky dunking? Uh no, not with this body.
27. Run a Marathon---I'd be dead and therefore wouldn't be typing out this list.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice--yeah, we can dream right?
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset--Yes, the best are near beaches...ahhhh
31. Hit a home run..with what? If you have ever seen me, I am not what you would call athletic....
32. Been on a cruise...Yes, down 4th avenue in Ontario with the old 69 GMC truck...oh wait, no not a boat cruise...one of these days though
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person---yes, when I was nanny in NY
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community--once again, yes, when I was a nanny in NY
36. Taught yourself a new language---ha ha ha, I have a hard enough time with english sometimes
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied...Um No, if I did, I wouldn't be typing this....Walter, the butler, would be
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing...not on purpose...only after I climbed that stupid mountain and then somehow had to get back down
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke...see #10....well, once I did at the Idaho State Fair but it was with a huge group of people and I wouldn't say it is my claim to fame
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt---Yeah, talk about good times...ha ha ha DH and I went to Yellowstone for our honeymoon and as we were walking back from Old Faithful, DH tripped and broke his foot. And you know how men are when they are hurt??? Loads of fun...
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant...Yes, DH and I did last March and it was a wonderful feeling. We need to do it more often....
44. Visited Africa--No, and really no desire to...too many bugs and animals
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight---Ahhh, yes...I absolutely love the beach
46. Been transported in an ambulance---uhhh, no....
47. Had your portrait painted--By who?
48. Gone deep sea fishing--I want to but DH won't take me...he got sick last time and has no desire to go back and feed the fish. ha ha ha
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris--NO but someday!
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling--No, maybe someday.
52. Kissed in the rain--sure, hasn't everyone?
53. Played in the mud--Yes and fell in the mud too. I will have to post about my issue with falling sometime...
54. Gone to a drive-in theater--Yep, talk about the good ol' days. That was a long time ago!
55. Been in a movie...They don't call me Angelina for nothing...Oh, wait, dreaming...no, I haven't
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business--well I have become independent consultants for a couple of different companies. And, well, you know me...I get bored and move on to something new...
58. Taken a martial arts class--No but I need to....Higghhhh yaaaa....take that buster!
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen---No but I seriously want to. I think it would be a very humbling experience and we all need those once in a while.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies...No, but I've eaten dozens of them
62. Gone whale watching...Yep and loved every minute of it. I am sure, in my former life, I was some sort of sea creature.
63. Got flowers for no reason---Yes, when we were newlyweds....I think the newness has worn off though...haven't seen fresh flowers in quite some time...hint, hint, hint
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma....Me + Needles=passing out/sheer terror.....So, no and probably won't ever..selfish I know..get over it...
65. Gone sky diving...Why in the world would I jump out of a perfectly good plane?
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp..No, but I seriously would like to. I think we really have no idea what they went through...would be a very humbling experience, I'm sure
67. Bounced a check--Geez, they get so personal on here. When I was young and stupid, in my 20's, I did and it was only for $3 and ended up costing $20 or so...stupid, stupid, stupid
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial...yes, with the Naked Ballerina...good times
71. Eaten Caviar...yes and a bit salty I might add...definitely not something I would order or crave...nasty
72. Pieced a quilt...Pieced yes, finished no
7 3. Stood in Times Square....Yep
74. Toured the Everglades...No, and no desire to. enough said.
75. Been fired from a job...Do you really think I would admit it here? No, I haven't
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (does a toe count?)--Well then yes....and I think I did something really bad to my nose one time. That is a good story for another time
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle...yes and was sure I was going to die...not a pleasant experience for me or the driver....
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person--No, but hopefully in the next year or so....
80. Published a book...Nope, but I am seriously working on one right now...
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car....ummm, no...maybe someday...
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper...Geez, did you see my mugshot too? Just kidding, of course I have....when I won the Malhuer Enterprise Newspaper subscription contest back in the early 80's....GO LOR, GO LOR
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House--Yep again with Naked Ballerina
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating...I am throwing up in my mouth right now....
88. Had chickenpox--Yes and let me tell you it was great! Just kidding, not fun at all...
89. Saved someone’s life....Yes, this one time I was riding the subway in NYC and I saw this man edging his way to the edge of the tracks. As the train was going 40+, I pried open the doors, rolled out, grabbed the man, putting my life in danger as well, and pulled him to safety under the edge of the tracks. Talk about an adrenaline rush!!!! Whew!!! Oh, well, ok, not really but if I had the chance I would....
90. Sat on a jury...Yes, once and it freaked me out. I really didn't like deciding where someone was going to spend the next 20 or so years of their life. He deserved it but still, I didn't enjoy it.
91. Met someone famous...Yep, had dinner with the Thompson Twins at Hard Rock Cafe in NYC, seriously. It was crazy fun....and if you don't know who they are, they are a band from the 80's. Good times!
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one--Yes, my dear Grandpa, who I still miss
94. Had a baby---no, boo hoo
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake--I really don't know
97. Been involved in a lawsuit...no, and hopefully never....
98. Owned a cell phone...have one now, hate the thing, don't answer it most of the time...I hate never being able to hide
99. Been stung by a Bee....Yep, more than once and each time it gets worse. I really need to get an epi pen but it involves needles and you all know I don't do needles.
Wow, can't believe I did it. Please do it and send it back to me! I would love to read your answers.
1. Started your own blog--DUH, you're reading it right now!
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii--Yep, last October with Ma, Pa, and DH
5. Watched a meteor shower--Yep, just last summer. Talk about awesome!
6. Given more than you can afford to charity--No, but this is on my bucket list!
7. Been to Disneyland--several times, the last being about 11 yrs ago
8. Climbed a mountain--Yes, and for the life of me can't figure out why. It was definitely not something I enjoyed.
9. Held a praying mantis--Yep, but not really on purpose. It landed on my shoulder and while trying to get it off of me, I had to grab it. I guess you could call that holding??
10. Sang a solo---Ha, ha, ha...funny....have you heard me sing? Didn't think so...
11. Bungee jumped---NOPE, stupid, stupid stupid idea...
12. Visited Paris--The city of love will see me one of these days though...
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea--Who in their right mind would do this? Lightning bolts vs. steel boat and people is not a good thing...
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child--Oh man, this is my dream! Hopefully soon...
16. Had food poisoning--Yes and I don't want to talk about it....
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty...Yes, when I was a nanny in NY
18. Grown your own vegetables--with my parents when I was a wee one
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked--stupid, just plain stupid
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill---Uh yes, and I got caught...I do however, once in awhile take a mental health day...doesn't everyone???
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping...you mean chunky dunking? Uh no, not with this body.
27. Run a Marathon---I'd be dead and therefore wouldn't be typing out this list.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice--yeah, we can dream right?
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset--Yes, the best are near beaches...ahhhh
31. Hit a home run..with what? If you have ever seen me, I am not what you would call athletic....
32. Been on a cruise...Yes, down 4th avenue in Ontario with the old 69 GMC truck...oh wait, no not a boat cruise...one of these days though
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person---yes, when I was nanny in NY
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community--once again, yes, when I was a nanny in NY
36. Taught yourself a new language---ha ha ha, I have a hard enough time with english sometimes
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied...Um No, if I did, I wouldn't be typing this....Walter, the butler, would be
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing...not on purpose...only after I climbed that stupid mountain and then somehow had to get back down
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke...see #10....well, once I did at the Idaho State Fair but it was with a huge group of people and I wouldn't say it is my claim to fame
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt---Yeah, talk about good times...ha ha ha DH and I went to Yellowstone for our honeymoon and as we were walking back from Old Faithful, DH tripped and broke his foot. And you know how men are when they are hurt??? Loads of fun...
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant...Yes, DH and I did last March and it was a wonderful feeling. We need to do it more often....
44. Visited Africa--No, and really no desire to...too many bugs and animals
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight---Ahhh, yes...I absolutely love the beach
46. Been transported in an ambulance---uhhh, no....
47. Had your portrait painted--By who?
48. Gone deep sea fishing--I want to but DH won't take me...he got sick last time and has no desire to go back and feed the fish. ha ha ha
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris--NO but someday!
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling--No, maybe someday.
52. Kissed in the rain--sure, hasn't everyone?
53. Played in the mud--Yes and fell in the mud too. I will have to post about my issue with falling sometime...
54. Gone to a drive-in theater--Yep, talk about the good ol' days. That was a long time ago!
55. Been in a movie...They don't call me Angelina for nothing...Oh, wait, dreaming...no, I haven't
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business--well I have become independent consultants for a couple of different companies. And, well, you know me...I get bored and move on to something new...
58. Taken a martial arts class--No but I need to....Higghhhh yaaaa....take that buster!
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen---No but I seriously want to. I think it would be a very humbling experience and we all need those once in a while.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies...No, but I've eaten dozens of them
62. Gone whale watching...Yep and loved every minute of it. I am sure, in my former life, I was some sort of sea creature.
63. Got flowers for no reason---Yes, when we were newlyweds....I think the newness has worn off though...haven't seen fresh flowers in quite some time...hint, hint, hint
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma....Me + Needles=passing out/sheer terror.....So, no and probably won't ever..selfish I know..get over it...
65. Gone sky diving...Why in the world would I jump out of a perfectly good plane?
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp..No, but I seriously would like to. I think we really have no idea what they went through...would be a very humbling experience, I'm sure
67. Bounced a check--Geez, they get so personal on here. When I was young and stupid, in my 20's, I did and it was only for $3 and ended up costing $20 or so...stupid, stupid, stupid
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial...yes, with the Naked Ballerina...good times
71. Eaten Caviar...yes and a bit salty I might add...definitely not something I would order or crave...nasty
72. Pieced a quilt...Pieced yes, finished no
7 3. Stood in Times Square....Yep
74. Toured the Everglades...No, and no desire to. enough said.
75. Been fired from a job...Do you really think I would admit it here? No, I haven't
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (does a toe count?)--Well then yes....and I think I did something really bad to my nose one time. That is a good story for another time
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle...yes and was sure I was going to die...not a pleasant experience for me or the driver....
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person--No, but hopefully in the next year or so....
80. Published a book...Nope, but I am seriously working on one right now...
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car....ummm, no...maybe someday...
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper...Geez, did you see my mugshot too? Just kidding, of course I have....when I won the Malhuer Enterprise Newspaper subscription contest back in the early 80's....GO LOR, GO LOR
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House--Yep again with Naked Ballerina
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating...I am throwing up in my mouth right now....
88. Had chickenpox--Yes and let me tell you it was great! Just kidding, not fun at all...
89. Saved someone’s life....Yes, this one time I was riding the subway in NYC and I saw this man edging his way to the edge of the tracks. As the train was going 40+, I pried open the doors, rolled out, grabbed the man, putting my life in danger as well, and pulled him to safety under the edge of the tracks. Talk about an adrenaline rush!!!! Whew!!! Oh, well, ok, not really but if I had the chance I would....
90. Sat on a jury...Yes, once and it freaked me out. I really didn't like deciding where someone was going to spend the next 20 or so years of their life. He deserved it but still, I didn't enjoy it.
91. Met someone famous...Yep, had dinner with the Thompson Twins at Hard Rock Cafe in NYC, seriously. It was crazy fun....and if you don't know who they are, they are a band from the 80's. Good times!
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one--Yes, my dear Grandpa, who I still miss
94. Had a baby---no, boo hoo
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake--I really don't know
97. Been involved in a lawsuit...no, and hopefully never....
98. Owned a cell phone...have one now, hate the thing, don't answer it most of the time...I hate never being able to hide
99. Been stung by a Bee....Yep, more than once and each time it gets worse. I really need to get an epi pen but it involves needles and you all know I don't do needles.
Wow, can't believe I did it. Please do it and send it back to me! I would love to read your answers.
Blessed....
It is almost the end of 2008 and I sit here realizing I am blessed beyond measure.
I am blessed to have a wonderful, loving husband who can drive me crazy at times but for the most part, is the man of my dreams. I am blessed to have him provide so well for me. I am blessed to know, without a doubt, that my husband is in as much love with me as I am with him. I am blessed to have a best friend, comedian, provider, protector, honest man who is my Husband.
I am blessed with a wonderful family, including DH's as well. We were able to go home for Christmas (through the snow and back in blizzards,etc.) and spend a few fun filled days surrounded by the love of my family. My parents have been the best at starting family traditions when we were younger. One of our alltime favorites includes a big fondue feast on Christmas Eve. I must tell you that this by far exceeds Christmas morning gifts!
I am blessed with wonderful friends, both near and far.
I am blessed....
I am blessed to have a wonderful, loving husband who can drive me crazy at times but for the most part, is the man of my dreams. I am blessed to have him provide so well for me. I am blessed to know, without a doubt, that my husband is in as much love with me as I am with him. I am blessed to have a best friend, comedian, provider, protector, honest man who is my Husband.
I am blessed with a wonderful family, including DH's as well. We were able to go home for Christmas (through the snow and back in blizzards,etc.) and spend a few fun filled days surrounded by the love of my family. My parents have been the best at starting family traditions when we were younger. One of our alltime favorites includes a big fondue feast on Christmas Eve. I must tell you that this by far exceeds Christmas morning gifts!
I am blessed with wonderful friends, both near and far.
I am blessed....
Thursday, December 04, 2008
The Life of LalalalaLola....
Tonight my friend Tink and I decided to have a girls night and go out for dinner and then look at Christmas lights. We ended up going to the local "Steak" house for grilled salmon, etc. The meal was good but the company was great!
As we were driving around after dinner, we started discussing our plans for Lola. Lola is a very important member of Tinks family but not what you would think of when you think, "Family Member." So, heres a little game. For the first person who can identify who or what Lola is....I will send you something in the mail. You must be specific enough to know what you are talking about....believe me, it will be right or it will be wrong. So.....guess away and let me know....
Here are some hints: Lola is an ever present part of their family, but doesn't breathe. Lola dresses up for every holiday. Lola is excited about every holiday, as is all her relatives, including a sister named Emmy. Lola loves picture windows. Lola loves most department stores...
Guess away and when someone has guessed, I will tell you a story about Lola and try to add a picture as well. It's a good one....
As we were driving around after dinner, we started discussing our plans for Lola. Lola is a very important member of Tinks family but not what you would think of when you think, "Family Member." So, heres a little game. For the first person who can identify who or what Lola is....I will send you something in the mail. You must be specific enough to know what you are talking about....believe me, it will be right or it will be wrong. So.....guess away and let me know....
Here are some hints: Lola is an ever present part of their family, but doesn't breathe. Lola dresses up for every holiday. Lola is excited about every holiday, as is all her relatives, including a sister named Emmy. Lola loves picture windows. Lola loves most department stores...
Guess away and when someone has guessed, I will tell you a story about Lola and try to add a picture as well. It's a good one....
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Love...it's a beautiful thing!
Last night we attended a wedding of one of DH's former advisement students. This class had an amazing group of young men that DH became extremely close to and has stayed in contact with. This was one of the first ones to take the plunge.
This wedding was held on a ranch a few miles out of town. I had been out there once before when DH and I were dating. I really had no idea what to expect until I got out there and realized this event was going to be a lot grander than I was picturing. We got out there a bit early and were able to park by the barns but most people had to park in the back 40, in hay fields, and then hop on a hay wagon pulled by a four wheeler. Since we parked closer to the event, we had to track through dirt and mud to get to the wedding site. After all, we were on a ranch!
The wedding took place in a big open grassy field area, overlooking a little pond and the mountains. It was absolutely beautiful! Trees and flowers were everywhere and the temperature was perfect--in the mid 80's. It is still very smoky here so there weren't blue skies but that didn't take away from the calm, peaceful feeling you got there.
After the wedding, we all grabbed our chairs and headed up the road , past the port-a-potties, to the covered hay barn where they had set up tables and the catered food wagons were waiting to serve us. The food was amazing, with free flowing beer, wine, champagne, bottled water, etc. The company was great too! It seems like funerals and weddings are great places to reconnect with people--too bad we can't find more everyday time to be with the people we got to see.
When I say that this is the biggest wedding I have ever been to, I am in no way exaggerating! There were about 400 people there, a lot of them wealthy ranchers and farmers from the outlying areas. I always joke with my husband regarding social events in this area. There is no set dress code. There will always be people in shorts, jeans, dress casual, formal, or "other" attire which means that you will fit in, no matter what you wear. Strangely, several times I have worn a dress to a wedding or funeral and felt very over dressed. It's weird.
Anyway, it got me thinking about our wedding six years ago. A huge, social event was the last thing on my mind. We were both older--30's--and very established in our homes. We really didn't need much to set up house. So, for us, our wedding was something very intimate and small. DH had also been extremely ill, hospitalized, and near death and for us, the only thing we wanted was to be together...forever....and not have to travel back and forth between CA and OR.
You see, when I have to be in front of a crowd of people, it is not a good thing. My stomach is in knots, I sweat, shake, and my face turns bright red. Never fails that I get diarrhea (Too much info, I know!) and I am a nervous wreck. So, anyway, when DH suggested that we take the next available school vacation and head to Lake Tahoe, I couldn't have loved that man anymore.
When he came up to visit for Valentines Weekend, we went and picked out a ring, got engaged, and planned a wedding ALL IN ONE WEEKEND! Lucky for us, DH happened to be talking to a fellow teacher who was also engaged to get married. She told him about Harvey's in Lake Tahoe and showed him the wedding chapel. It was perfect for us and allowed us to pick and choose the package we wanted and the number of people we wanted attending. Our package allowed 30 people (which was actually more than I would have opted for) and in the end we had 27 plus ourselves there.
Our wedding was beautiful and perfect for us. I am sure our parents would have preferred a church wedding but us becoming husband and wife was what was important, not where it took place. After our ceremony, we had exactly 1/2 hour with the photographer (that's what our package "said") and he amazingly got some very good photos. We then had a couple of hours to hang out before our dinner. I remember so perfectly, walking up to our suite to change clothes so we could head to dinner. I looked at my husband and was so filled with love and peace for this man that I had just said "I do" to. It was such a surreal moment and, honestly one I didn't know if I would ever experience.
Our wedding dinner was held at "The Chart House", a steak and seafood restaurant sitting above Lake Tahoe on the hillside. We were able to reserve the back room which was a beautiful room with floor to ceiling windows facing the lake. We were able to pick out the food selections before hand and they had very nice menu cards placed at each setting. We had several waitresses and waiters who catered to our every demand and they did a great job as well. As we were eating and visiting, we got to watch the sun set over Lake Tahoe. It was absolutely amazing!
I guess my point is, no matter how big or how small, a wedding is a wonderful thing! For us, it was all about us and our day and that is why we chose to celebrate with just a few of our friends and family. For others, hundreds of people complete their wedding day.
This I know---I love the man I married. No matter where, no matter how, I am the happiest woman alive and married to the most perfect man for me. I hope me knows how happy he has made me. Sweetie, I love you!
This wedding was held on a ranch a few miles out of town. I had been out there once before when DH and I were dating. I really had no idea what to expect until I got out there and realized this event was going to be a lot grander than I was picturing. We got out there a bit early and were able to park by the barns but most people had to park in the back 40, in hay fields, and then hop on a hay wagon pulled by a four wheeler. Since we parked closer to the event, we had to track through dirt and mud to get to the wedding site. After all, we were on a ranch!
The wedding took place in a big open grassy field area, overlooking a little pond and the mountains. It was absolutely beautiful! Trees and flowers were everywhere and the temperature was perfect--in the mid 80's. It is still very smoky here so there weren't blue skies but that didn't take away from the calm, peaceful feeling you got there.
After the wedding, we all grabbed our chairs and headed up the road , past the port-a-potties, to the covered hay barn where they had set up tables and the catered food wagons were waiting to serve us. The food was amazing, with free flowing beer, wine, champagne, bottled water, etc. The company was great too! It seems like funerals and weddings are great places to reconnect with people--too bad we can't find more everyday time to be with the people we got to see.
When I say that this is the biggest wedding I have ever been to, I am in no way exaggerating! There were about 400 people there, a lot of them wealthy ranchers and farmers from the outlying areas. I always joke with my husband regarding social events in this area. There is no set dress code. There will always be people in shorts, jeans, dress casual, formal, or "other" attire which means that you will fit in, no matter what you wear. Strangely, several times I have worn a dress to a wedding or funeral and felt very over dressed. It's weird.
Anyway, it got me thinking about our wedding six years ago. A huge, social event was the last thing on my mind. We were both older--30's--and very established in our homes. We really didn't need much to set up house. So, for us, our wedding was something very intimate and small. DH had also been extremely ill, hospitalized, and near death and for us, the only thing we wanted was to be together...forever....and not have to travel back and forth between CA and OR.
You see, when I have to be in front of a crowd of people, it is not a good thing. My stomach is in knots, I sweat, shake, and my face turns bright red. Never fails that I get diarrhea (Too much info, I know!) and I am a nervous wreck. So, anyway, when DH suggested that we take the next available school vacation and head to Lake Tahoe, I couldn't have loved that man anymore.
When he came up to visit for Valentines Weekend, we went and picked out a ring, got engaged, and planned a wedding ALL IN ONE WEEKEND! Lucky for us, DH happened to be talking to a fellow teacher who was also engaged to get married. She told him about Harvey's in Lake Tahoe and showed him the wedding chapel. It was perfect for us and allowed us to pick and choose the package we wanted and the number of people we wanted attending. Our package allowed 30 people (which was actually more than I would have opted for) and in the end we had 27 plus ourselves there.
Our wedding was beautiful and perfect for us. I am sure our parents would have preferred a church wedding but us becoming husband and wife was what was important, not where it took place. After our ceremony, we had exactly 1/2 hour with the photographer (that's what our package "said") and he amazingly got some very good photos. We then had a couple of hours to hang out before our dinner. I remember so perfectly, walking up to our suite to change clothes so we could head to dinner. I looked at my husband and was so filled with love and peace for this man that I had just said "I do" to. It was such a surreal moment and, honestly one I didn't know if I would ever experience.
Our wedding dinner was held at "The Chart House", a steak and seafood restaurant sitting above Lake Tahoe on the hillside. We were able to reserve the back room which was a beautiful room with floor to ceiling windows facing the lake. We were able to pick out the food selections before hand and they had very nice menu cards placed at each setting. We had several waitresses and waiters who catered to our every demand and they did a great job as well. As we were eating and visiting, we got to watch the sun set over Lake Tahoe. It was absolutely amazing!
I guess my point is, no matter how big or how small, a wedding is a wonderful thing! For us, it was all about us and our day and that is why we chose to celebrate with just a few of our friends and family. For others, hundreds of people complete their wedding day.
This I know---I love the man I married. No matter where, no matter how, I am the happiest woman alive and married to the most perfect man for me. I hope me knows how happy he has made me. Sweetie, I love you!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
No regrets...
My parents and Bear were able to make the two hour journey to attend Steve's funeral. It was a graveside service with many people attending, which solidifies the influence Steve had on the lives of many. Bear was visibly upset, but was very comforted when he arrived and spotted Karen Ann right away--a friend, fellow classmate, and leader to him. She had previously worked at the Workshop he now attends and works at and has always been a real friend to him. My mom said he was instantly drawn to her and left their side to be with her through the service. At one point, my mom looked over and Karen Ann had her arm around Bear. That was the one thing that sustained him through the service.
It is so hard to know how he truly feels in a situation like this. However, both of my parents said it was very evident that he was deeply affected by this. While driving to the service, he kept telling them that he was sad---my guess is that this was his way of saying he needed to be comforted as well. After the service was over and they got in the car, Bear said over and over, "Karen Ann put her arm around me." For him, that was the one thing that anyone could have done to help him get through the pain he was feeling at the time. In my heart too, I think maybe Karen Ann was comforted by Bear as well. Thank You Karen Ann for being there for Bear!
After writing about this experience, I have recieved several emails and calls. I am amazed at the people that have found out about these posts and am also very touched by the ones who have passed it on to others. Thank you for sharing this---I already know how special these guys are but love that everyone else is getting to know and fall in love with them as well.
If you ever get the chance to attend or volunteer with Special Olympics, I so urge you to do so. You will never regret spending time with these amazing athletes and heroes. You will never regret giving and getting hugs. You will never regret clapping and cheering harder than you ever have in your whole life. You will never regret the tears you shed that day (tears of joy and pure amazement at what you are able to be a part of). You will never regret falling in love with complete strangers who are tugging at your heart strings so hard, you have to consciously keep yourself in your seat. But most of all, you will never regret the lessons you learn that day from people who will touch your lives forever. You will never have any regrets about being a part of Special Olympics!
It is so hard to know how he truly feels in a situation like this. However, both of my parents said it was very evident that he was deeply affected by this. While driving to the service, he kept telling them that he was sad---my guess is that this was his way of saying he needed to be comforted as well. After the service was over and they got in the car, Bear said over and over, "Karen Ann put her arm around me." For him, that was the one thing that anyone could have done to help him get through the pain he was feeling at the time. In my heart too, I think maybe Karen Ann was comforted by Bear as well. Thank You Karen Ann for being there for Bear!
After writing about this experience, I have recieved several emails and calls. I am amazed at the people that have found out about these posts and am also very touched by the ones who have passed it on to others. Thank you for sharing this---I already know how special these guys are but love that everyone else is getting to know and fall in love with them as well.
If you ever get the chance to attend or volunteer with Special Olympics, I so urge you to do so. You will never regret spending time with these amazing athletes and heroes. You will never regret giving and getting hugs. You will never regret clapping and cheering harder than you ever have in your whole life. You will never regret the tears you shed that day (tears of joy and pure amazement at what you are able to be a part of). You will never regret falling in love with complete strangers who are tugging at your heart strings so hard, you have to consciously keep yourself in your seat. But most of all, you will never regret the lessons you learn that day from people who will touch your lives forever. You will never have any regrets about being a part of Special Olympics!
Monday, July 14, 2008
tag....I am it!
Someone sent this to me via email so I am going to try it on my blog here.
1. 4 jobs I've had :
Intstructional Assistant for physically and mentally challenged children
Slave for a Group Home for Mentally Challenged Male Sex Offenders
Clerk at Video Store
Nanny on Long Island for a newborn for two years
2. 4 movies I can watch over and over
Sweet Home Alabama
Overboard
Sixteen Candles
Dumb and Dumber (and I laugh harder each time I watch it!)
3. 4 places I have lived:
Ontario, OR --Don't get too excited....Ontario....WooHoo~
Great Neck, NY--Nanny for two years
Vale, OR--Grew up here...enough said
Juntura, OR--I don't remember living here. This was my first home with my parents and we moved after the school year was over for my Dad.
4. 4 favorite TV shows:
Survivor
WipeOut
Adoption Story
Amazing Race
5. 4 Places I've been:
Niagra Falls
Maui, Hawaii
Las Vegas, NV
NYC, NY
6. 4 Favorite foods:
Veggie Delight Sandwich from Subway
Any sort of seafood
Scarface Pasta from DiChicos in Fresno
Tacos
7. 4 websites I visit daily:
Two Peas in A Bucket
Etsy.com
Cnn.com
Various blogs
8. 4 Places I'd rather be:
Bandon, OR
A Cruise (Which will happen in a year-WooHoo!)
Visiting friends and family in OR/ID
Back in Hawaii sipping pina coladas
4 Blog buddies I want to tag:
Surprise me....
1. 4 jobs I've had :
Intstructional Assistant for physically and mentally challenged children
Slave for a Group Home for Mentally Challenged Male Sex Offenders
Clerk at Video Store
Nanny on Long Island for a newborn for two years
2. 4 movies I can watch over and over
Sweet Home Alabama
Overboard
Sixteen Candles
Dumb and Dumber (and I laugh harder each time I watch it!)
3. 4 places I have lived:
Ontario, OR --Don't get too excited....Ontario....WooHoo~
Great Neck, NY--Nanny for two years
Vale, OR--Grew up here...enough said
Juntura, OR--I don't remember living here. This was my first home with my parents and we moved after the school year was over for my Dad.
4. 4 favorite TV shows:
Survivor
WipeOut
Adoption Story
Amazing Race
5. 4 Places I've been:
Niagra Falls
Maui, Hawaii
Las Vegas, NV
NYC, NY
6. 4 Favorite foods:
Veggie Delight Sandwich from Subway
Any sort of seafood
Scarface Pasta from DiChicos in Fresno
Tacos
7. 4 websites I visit daily:
Two Peas in A Bucket
Etsy.com
Cnn.com
Various blogs
8. 4 Places I'd rather be:
Bandon, OR
A Cruise (Which will happen in a year-WooHoo!)
Visiting friends and family in OR/ID
Back in Hawaii sipping pina coladas
4 Blog buddies I want to tag:
Surprise me....
Hugs
I talked to my Mom yesterday after a restless night. I was concerned that Bear hadn't found out yet that Steve had passed away. Since my Mom hadn't heard for Bear, we assumed that he didn't know yet. Our assumption was correct.
Bear called later to fill my parents in. He was devastated as I suspected he would be. He repeatedly told my Mom that he just needed a hug. My heart literally broke for him. Of course he needed a hug, he lost a great friend who he could relate to at such a personal level. If I could have jumped through the phone line I would have hugged him a million times plus one. He so needed to have his family.
My mom decided to go pick him up (he lives in a group home about 20 minutes from them--another post for later) and have him spend the night with them. She and Bear will then drive two hours today to go to Steve's graveside service. When she told me she was doing this, my eyes watered up. What a wonderful way for Bear to be able to say Goodbye, in his own way, to Steve. Today has been a pretty subdued day for me as I so wish I lived closer to them and could have gone with them. I know Steve is in a much better place, swimming his heart out, but he will surely be missed by all he touched.
I am anxious to talk to my Mom tonight to find out how Bear handled the day. It is so hard to know what is going on inside his mind and heart in situations like this. He has such a hard time communicating so his being able to express that he needed hugs was a big thing for him. Because of Bear's disabilities, he is always around others with problems as well. Some of them much worse. For only being 3o years old, he has experienced a lot of death within his circle. Many are not very healthy and are considerably older than him. Two of his housemates are in ill health as well and we know the time is soon for them. I only hope that he can somehow understand all of this and make some sense of it.
I only wish I was closer to hug him. Love ya Bear!
Bear called later to fill my parents in. He was devastated as I suspected he would be. He repeatedly told my Mom that he just needed a hug. My heart literally broke for him. Of course he needed a hug, he lost a great friend who he could relate to at such a personal level. If I could have jumped through the phone line I would have hugged him a million times plus one. He so needed to have his family.
My mom decided to go pick him up (he lives in a group home about 20 minutes from them--another post for later) and have him spend the night with them. She and Bear will then drive two hours today to go to Steve's graveside service. When she told me she was doing this, my eyes watered up. What a wonderful way for Bear to be able to say Goodbye, in his own way, to Steve. Today has been a pretty subdued day for me as I so wish I lived closer to them and could have gone with them. I know Steve is in a much better place, swimming his heart out, but he will surely be missed by all he touched.
I am anxious to talk to my Mom tonight to find out how Bear handled the day. It is so hard to know what is going on inside his mind and heart in situations like this. He has such a hard time communicating so his being able to express that he needed hugs was a big thing for him. Because of Bear's disabilities, he is always around others with problems as well. Some of them much worse. For only being 3o years old, he has experienced a lot of death within his circle. Many are not very healthy and are considerably older than him. Two of his housemates are in ill health as well and we know the time is soon for them. I only hope that he can somehow understand all of this and make some sense of it.
I only wish I was closer to hug him. Love ya Bear!
The Summer List....cont'd
Ok, here is the beginning of my summer list. Strangely, summer is about 1/2 over and it feels like it has just started.
1. Clean out all closets (and hide Dh's stuff before he sees what I am throwing out.)
2. Have a big yardsale (although DH would pay me not to have one)
3. Pick out paint colors for both bathrooms and bedroom
4. Paint bedroom and bathrooms (Enlist help for this (promise pizza and drinks afterwards...doesn't everywork for food?)
5. Finish painting kitchen
6. Pick out new color to paint accents wall in Living Room (Dh hubby could possibly kill me for doing this)
7. Pick out burial plot--see above (TOTALLY just joking!)
8. Help DH clean and organize garage (throw away stuff when he isn't looking!)
9. Go through all Christmas decorations and get rid of what we don't use (don't let DH help--he'd make sure we don't use any!)
10. Organize scrap/craft room(Make path to get into room first!)
11. Donate craft and scrap supplies that I don't want(yeah right, who am I kidding? I want everything in there!)
12. Organize craft patterns and start planning for bazaars
13. Stain front deck
14. Start planning trip for spring break--maybe to NYC ??
15.
Am I for real? Is this all really going to get done? Good grief, even I can figure out the answers to these questions. Oh well, I can dream. And a plan is always good, right? Any helpers volunteering?
Anyhoo, I have a lot to do and not a lot of time. The big wedding is this weekend which will be fun for DH. Lots of his favorite former students will be there that he hasn't seen for quite some time. I am excited for him....
Next Thursday we are headed down south to visit with DH's parents and his brother and family. It should be fun and relaxing. However I don't look forward to the 100+ degree weather there but am thankful that his parents have a pool. Fun times!
The smoke here is unbelievable. We live at the base of a beautiful mountain and for days we have not been able to see it. I am stuffed up every day and just plain not feeling up to par. I am chalking it all up to the smoke playing with my allergies. We are so thankful for all the firefighters that have been working day in and day out to get these fires under control. Their jobs are not fun, especially in the heat and their lives really are on the line. If you see a firefighter, thank them for us.....we really do appreciate them and owe them a lot!
Thankfully for us, we live in town, not directly surrounded by the monsterous pines that so many places around here do have. Last year we had two 100+ feet trees taken out. I feel much better with those gone but sure miss the beauty of them. However we do have several friends living outside the city limits that have been placed on notice or have been evacuated in the past few weeks, due to the fires, and have felt their fear and nervousness as they waited. Thankfully none of them lost their homes but many have. We feel for them and definitely keep them in our thoughts and prayers.
I am off to finish the laundry and then tackle the crap room (I mean scraproom). Wish me luck!
1. Clean out all closets (and hide Dh's stuff before he sees what I am throwing out.)
2. Have a big yardsale (although DH would pay me not to have one)
3. Pick out paint colors for both bathrooms and bedroom
4. Paint bedroom and bathrooms (Enlist help for this (promise pizza and drinks afterwards...doesn't everywork for food?)
5. Finish painting kitchen
6. Pick out new color to paint accents wall in Living Room (Dh hubby could possibly kill me for doing this)
7. Pick out burial plot--see above (TOTALLY just joking!)
8. Help DH clean and organize garage (throw away stuff when he isn't looking!)
9. Go through all Christmas decorations and get rid of what we don't use (don't let DH help--he'd make sure we don't use any!)
10. Organize scrap/craft room(Make path to get into room first!)
11. Donate craft and scrap supplies that I don't want(yeah right, who am I kidding? I want everything in there!)
12. Organize craft patterns and start planning for bazaars
13. Stain front deck
14. Start planning trip for spring break--maybe to NYC ??
15.
Am I for real? Is this all really going to get done? Good grief, even I can figure out the answers to these questions. Oh well, I can dream. And a plan is always good, right? Any helpers volunteering?
Anyhoo, I have a lot to do and not a lot of time. The big wedding is this weekend which will be fun for DH. Lots of his favorite former students will be there that he hasn't seen for quite some time. I am excited for him....
Next Thursday we are headed down south to visit with DH's parents and his brother and family. It should be fun and relaxing. However I don't look forward to the 100+ degree weather there but am thankful that his parents have a pool. Fun times!
The smoke here is unbelievable. We live at the base of a beautiful mountain and for days we have not been able to see it. I am stuffed up every day and just plain not feeling up to par. I am chalking it all up to the smoke playing with my allergies. We are so thankful for all the firefighters that have been working day in and day out to get these fires under control. Their jobs are not fun, especially in the heat and their lives really are on the line. If you see a firefighter, thank them for us.....we really do appreciate them and owe them a lot!
Thankfully for us, we live in town, not directly surrounded by the monsterous pines that so many places around here do have. Last year we had two 100+ feet trees taken out. I feel much better with those gone but sure miss the beauty of them. However we do have several friends living outside the city limits that have been placed on notice or have been evacuated in the past few weeks, due to the fires, and have felt their fear and nervousness as they waited. Thankfully none of them lost their homes but many have. We feel for them and definitely keep them in our thoughts and prayers.
I am off to finish the laundry and then tackle the crap room (I mean scraproom). Wish me luck!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Days of Summer....
The summer to do list is going to have to wait. There are more pressing things to talk about right now.
DH and I just returned from a fun filled 10 day trip to Bandon-By-Sea, Oregon. The sun was out EVERY single day--which we all know is a big WOW on the Oregon Coast. The wind was also out in full force. However, we were able to spend some much needed time together, walk the beach, go for adventurous drives, critique restaurants, and Shop. The last being my favorite!!!!
I think this is the one place we truly look forward to going to each year. It is a place without TV, landline phones, etc. The world seems to go on but we have no idea when or how. It is very relaxing and kind of brings us back to the place we need to be.
Several people in my life (one way or another) have passed away in the past few days. A guy I went to school with was killed (beaten for money after he left a bar) who was only 40 years old. I hope his family is holding up ok and I know the days ahead will be long and painful. I am sure there will be a trial and I can't imagine the pain that will dredge up as well. My heart is with them all.
A few weeks ago, DH and I went to Boise to watch my little brother participate in Special Olympics. For him, this is one of the things that makes life worth living. His self confidence is amazing and he is so proud of himself. We really felt like we needed to support him and when he asked if we were coming, there was no way I could not go.
The olympics were held in a new, state of the art YMCA Facility that blew my socks off. There were several different pools for the participants to swim in, according to their levels and races. As we were all gathered, waiting for the swim walk that Bear was going to participate in, he introduced me to a fellow olympian named Steve. In talking with Steve, we both realized that I had gone to school with his sister-in-law. After that, there was bond between us. He zoned in on that and talked to me every second he could. His mind was amazing, as he could remember everything--dates, names, etc. He and Bear had to race against each other and as the race ended, Bear turned around, waited for Steve and high fived him.
This is why I love them! No matter who wins, no matter who fails, they are there for each other! It didn't matter who won, they were both so incredibly proud of themselves and each other. As they exited the pool, they put their arms around each other and told each other what a great job the other had done in their own language. I have a picture to prove it!
I admit, I got teary eyed watching it and realized then that they aren't the one with "problems"--we are. They have it all figured out. We don't. They know the right way to live. They know the right things to say. And they do it without hesitation. I was amazed at the lessons I learned by watching these olympians, these heroes. I realized that life should be seen as they see it. Our view is way too clouded. Way too junked up. Their view is as clear as can be.
After their races, we all went outside for the medal ceremony. I was so in awe, I could not even speak. I stood in amazement and watched every single olympian, whether they had won or not, absolutely grin from ear to ear at their medal and even bigger at each of their opponent's medals. I watched them help each other up to the podium and help each other down. I watched them cheer louder for their competitors than themselves. I watched them look at their competitors medals, and when realizing they were on backwards, gently lift it off and place it on correctly. I realized I am absolutely in love with Bear and so thankful that he is a part of our lives. I realized all the lessons I was being taught that day....
Fast forward to tonight. I was checking the news, etc. on the computer and decided to check in on my old hometown newspaper. Much to my shock, I had to see and read Steve's obituary. Only a couple of weeks ago he was so full of life and never in a million years would dream that I was going to be reading his obit. My heart sank. My eyes watered and I struggled to try and figure out why I was feeling so distraught. I realized my pain was for Bear. I realized that this will be devastating for him. I realized that I will feel a connection to this story when he tells me about Steve passing, about how he will miss him because he was his best friend, and about how he is sad. I realized I am sad too. Steve, thank you for everything you taught me that Sat. morning. You taught me more than you will ever know.
After getting over that shock, I looked down and saw one more name in the obituaries. Barbara and I worked together at OHS as Special Education Assistants. She was much older than me, almost like a grandmother figure. She was a very beautiful, opinionated, and overly organized woman who absolutely loved the children she worked with. Every day she came to school looking so pretty and put together and ready to go. I always admired that about her.
Several years after I left, she started working with my Mom at school. My mom talked about her and kept her informed about what I was doing. When DH and I got married, Barbara was unable to come to our reception due to having surgery, but sent us a very nice waffle iron. It has been used a lot and I always think of her when I use it. It was one of those gifts that I was so touched by as I was not expecting to hear from her and was so surprised when Mom gave it to me.
Anyway, I know that she had been struggling with some health issues over the years and only hope that she wasn't suffering much before she passed away. I hope that someone was with her to hold her hand and tell her they loved her. I am not sure she heard that a lot. I hope that she didn't die alone. I hope she can read this and know that her friendship really meant a lot to me. When there were some big issues going on at the school, she was one of the few that was able to help me through it. I hope she knows how thankful I was for her at that time.
Barbara, even though I hadn't talked to you in a long time, I missed you and love you and hope that you are now running without pain and playing with your puppies. Til we meet again....
DH and I just returned from a fun filled 10 day trip to Bandon-By-Sea, Oregon. The sun was out EVERY single day--which we all know is a big WOW on the Oregon Coast. The wind was also out in full force. However, we were able to spend some much needed time together, walk the beach, go for adventurous drives, critique restaurants, and Shop. The last being my favorite!!!!
I think this is the one place we truly look forward to going to each year. It is a place without TV, landline phones, etc. The world seems to go on but we have no idea when or how. It is very relaxing and kind of brings us back to the place we need to be.
Several people in my life (one way or another) have passed away in the past few days. A guy I went to school with was killed (beaten for money after he left a bar) who was only 40 years old. I hope his family is holding up ok and I know the days ahead will be long and painful. I am sure there will be a trial and I can't imagine the pain that will dredge up as well. My heart is with them all.
A few weeks ago, DH and I went to Boise to watch my little brother participate in Special Olympics. For him, this is one of the things that makes life worth living. His self confidence is amazing and he is so proud of himself. We really felt like we needed to support him and when he asked if we were coming, there was no way I could not go.
The olympics were held in a new, state of the art YMCA Facility that blew my socks off. There were several different pools for the participants to swim in, according to their levels and races. As we were all gathered, waiting for the swim walk that Bear was going to participate in, he introduced me to a fellow olympian named Steve. In talking with Steve, we both realized that I had gone to school with his sister-in-law. After that, there was bond between us. He zoned in on that and talked to me every second he could. His mind was amazing, as he could remember everything--dates, names, etc. He and Bear had to race against each other and as the race ended, Bear turned around, waited for Steve and high fived him.
This is why I love them! No matter who wins, no matter who fails, they are there for each other! It didn't matter who won, they were both so incredibly proud of themselves and each other. As they exited the pool, they put their arms around each other and told each other what a great job the other had done in their own language. I have a picture to prove it!
I admit, I got teary eyed watching it and realized then that they aren't the one with "problems"--we are. They have it all figured out. We don't. They know the right way to live. They know the right things to say. And they do it without hesitation. I was amazed at the lessons I learned by watching these olympians, these heroes. I realized that life should be seen as they see it. Our view is way too clouded. Way too junked up. Their view is as clear as can be.
After their races, we all went outside for the medal ceremony. I was so in awe, I could not even speak. I stood in amazement and watched every single olympian, whether they had won or not, absolutely grin from ear to ear at their medal and even bigger at each of their opponent's medals. I watched them help each other up to the podium and help each other down. I watched them cheer louder for their competitors than themselves. I watched them look at their competitors medals, and when realizing they were on backwards, gently lift it off and place it on correctly. I realized I am absolutely in love with Bear and so thankful that he is a part of our lives. I realized all the lessons I was being taught that day....
Fast forward to tonight. I was checking the news, etc. on the computer and decided to check in on my old hometown newspaper. Much to my shock, I had to see and read Steve's obituary. Only a couple of weeks ago he was so full of life and never in a million years would dream that I was going to be reading his obit. My heart sank. My eyes watered and I struggled to try and figure out why I was feeling so distraught. I realized my pain was for Bear. I realized that this will be devastating for him. I realized that I will feel a connection to this story when he tells me about Steve passing, about how he will miss him because he was his best friend, and about how he is sad. I realized I am sad too. Steve, thank you for everything you taught me that Sat. morning. You taught me more than you will ever know.
After getting over that shock, I looked down and saw one more name in the obituaries. Barbara and I worked together at OHS as Special Education Assistants. She was much older than me, almost like a grandmother figure. She was a very beautiful, opinionated, and overly organized woman who absolutely loved the children she worked with. Every day she came to school looking so pretty and put together and ready to go. I always admired that about her.
Several years after I left, she started working with my Mom at school. My mom talked about her and kept her informed about what I was doing. When DH and I got married, Barbara was unable to come to our reception due to having surgery, but sent us a very nice waffle iron. It has been used a lot and I always think of her when I use it. It was one of those gifts that I was so touched by as I was not expecting to hear from her and was so surprised when Mom gave it to me.
Anyway, I know that she had been struggling with some health issues over the years and only hope that she wasn't suffering much before she passed away. I hope that someone was with her to hold her hand and tell her they loved her. I am not sure she heard that a lot. I hope that she didn't die alone. I hope she can read this and know that her friendship really meant a lot to me. When there were some big issues going on at the school, she was one of the few that was able to help me through it. I hope she knows how thankful I was for her at that time.
Barbara, even though I hadn't talked to you in a long time, I missed you and love you and hope that you are now running without pain and playing with your puppies. Til we meet again....
Monday, June 09, 2008
The Summer List....
In the next few days I will be posting a detailed summer list of things to do. Most of them will be things that should have been done months or years ago but have patiently waited for me to get around to them.
My most exciting and scary thing is to work on my weight. That plan is in the making....
Be on the lookout. This post will be long. And I am going to need your help.
My most exciting and scary thing is to work on my weight. That plan is in the making....
Be on the lookout. This post will be long. And I am going to need your help.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and then there was...SUMMER!!!
As I type, there are only 4 days of school left for the children. I will have to work the following Monday to wrap things up but I can finally see the end.
School has been strange this year. It seems like it was just starting last week and Christmas was just a few days ago. I honestly have no idea where the time has gone. I am sure in no time at all, another year will begin. And this past year will be five years ago....
The kids have long ago checked out. Right now we are just a glorified babysitter for 350 little runts (who I love dearly). But really, I don't mind. This is the time of year where you start to see really funny and quirky personalities surface, as well as sides that we could care less ever seeing. For some reason they feel they have gotten smarter and less visible. Neither have been proven to be true!
The sixth graders are ready to make their pilgrimage to the High School where they will get to feel like the first time 5 year olds again. It makes me laugh. They are scared to death and have started clinging for all they are worth. The big macho boys who could have cared less two months ago are now hanging around my classroom and desk, not wanting to leave and having to be forced to leave. I feel bad for them but am excited for them also. Their hormones have been in full gear for about a year and they are now walking empty shells of hormones in sneakers. That part can drive me crazy at times. I am going to miss them!
The girls can only spell DRAMA! They drive me crazy! Thanks to this sixth grade class, I am even more convinced that I should only mother boys. I absolutely have no tolerance or patience for the girls...and they know it. Poor things.
Welcome Summer---you have been anxiously teasing me for some months!!!
School has been strange this year. It seems like it was just starting last week and Christmas was just a few days ago. I honestly have no idea where the time has gone. I am sure in no time at all, another year will begin. And this past year will be five years ago....
The kids have long ago checked out. Right now we are just a glorified babysitter for 350 little runts (who I love dearly). But really, I don't mind. This is the time of year where you start to see really funny and quirky personalities surface, as well as sides that we could care less ever seeing. For some reason they feel they have gotten smarter and less visible. Neither have been proven to be true!
The sixth graders are ready to make their pilgrimage to the High School where they will get to feel like the first time 5 year olds again. It makes me laugh. They are scared to death and have started clinging for all they are worth. The big macho boys who could have cared less two months ago are now hanging around my classroom and desk, not wanting to leave and having to be forced to leave. I feel bad for them but am excited for them also. Their hormones have been in full gear for about a year and they are now walking empty shells of hormones in sneakers. That part can drive me crazy at times. I am going to miss them!
The girls can only spell DRAMA! They drive me crazy! Thanks to this sixth grade class, I am even more convinced that I should only mother boys. I absolutely have no tolerance or patience for the girls...and they know it. Poor things.
Welcome Summer---you have been anxiously teasing me for some months!!!
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Too doo too doo too doo List
1. Finish all laundry (Oh, and put it away...where it belongs -I hate this part)
2. Wash all bedding on both beds (And actually make beds)
3. Set up treadmill
4. Use treadmill (for excercise, not clothes closet!)
5. Make menu for the week (Take out doesn't count!)
6. Candle Order
7. AT Order
8. Vacuum and dust
9. Clean kitchen
10. Scrap two pages
11. Work on organizing scrapbook room (Crap room as DH calls it!)
This list is never ending and so depressing. Hopefully all will be crossed off by the end of the evening!
2. Wash all bedding on both beds (And actually make beds)
3. Set up treadmill
4. Use treadmill (for excercise, not clothes closet!)
5. Make menu for the week (Take out doesn't count!)
6. Candle Order
7. AT Order
8. Vacuum and dust
9. Clean kitchen
10. Scrap two pages
11. Work on organizing scrapbook room (Crap room as DH calls it!)
This list is never ending and so depressing. Hopefully all will be crossed off by the end of the evening!
This place they call my home
As of the end of March, this town has been my home for six years. It still does not feel like home to me. It is a strange town---one greatly divided. The town is run mainly by two logging mills, which employ numerous average working class families. This town is also home to a Native American Tribe, many live here still today.
Strangely this town is also made up of many socially elite people. A good group of them are innertwined with the school which directly affects me. However I really do not fit in with them, except on their terms. I have found that I am mostly disgusted by their attitude towards others and their ability to shun or degrade someone without ever saying a word. Most of these women call themselves Christians and are never above reminding you of this on a daily basis. They sure aren't good examples of one however....On a daily basis I walk on eggshells, wondering if I will be on their "Hello" side or "Ignore" side.
DH and I are in a strange place these days. Most people our ages have children in high school and grade school. We have neither. I think, at times, we are purposely left out of gatherings due to that fact. People feel that we would not enjoy hanging out kids and having our every conversation be about them. In fact, we would love nothing more than to be involved in those. Even if we choose to adopt, we will still be in a strange place. While most of our friends children will then be in High school or college, we will just be starting out.
Since being in this town, all I have ever wanted is to have the friendships that I had while I was in Oregon. I have never considered myself someone hard to get along with and have, in fact, always had an adundance of friends. So, this has been a new and very sad experience for me. I have hoped and had plans of just giving up on finding that one friend or friends that would be there for me like I have had in the past. However, I am the type of person who just needs and has to have friends around to survive. So I still wait for that one person to fill that empty void that I have had forever.....
DH has promised that once we retire, we can move anywhere I want. I seriously count those days....every day. I can't wait to find a new place to call home....
Strangely this town is also made up of many socially elite people. A good group of them are innertwined with the school which directly affects me. However I really do not fit in with them, except on their terms. I have found that I am mostly disgusted by their attitude towards others and their ability to shun or degrade someone without ever saying a word. Most of these women call themselves Christians and are never above reminding you of this on a daily basis. They sure aren't good examples of one however....On a daily basis I walk on eggshells, wondering if I will be on their "Hello" side or "Ignore" side.
DH and I are in a strange place these days. Most people our ages have children in high school and grade school. We have neither. I think, at times, we are purposely left out of gatherings due to that fact. People feel that we would not enjoy hanging out kids and having our every conversation be about them. In fact, we would love nothing more than to be involved in those. Even if we choose to adopt, we will still be in a strange place. While most of our friends children will then be in High school or college, we will just be starting out.
Since being in this town, all I have ever wanted is to have the friendships that I had while I was in Oregon. I have never considered myself someone hard to get along with and have, in fact, always had an adundance of friends. So, this has been a new and very sad experience for me. I have hoped and had plans of just giving up on finding that one friend or friends that would be there for me like I have had in the past. However, I am the type of person who just needs and has to have friends around to survive. So I still wait for that one person to fill that empty void that I have had forever.....
DH has promised that once we retire, we can move anywhere I want. I seriously count those days....every day. I can't wait to find a new place to call home....
Saturday, May 17, 2008
19 Days and counting....oh, but who's really counting????
This school year has gone by incredibly fast. I can still remember being back the first day and picturing what would happen this year. I don't think much has happened according to my plan I had in my head, but in all it has been a good year.
It has been a stressful year in that, for a small school of about 350, at least 8 kids have been directly affected by death. They either lost a mother, a father, or a sibling. Kids never cease to amaze me though. They bounce back with a resilience that I no longer posess. I sometimes wish I still had it but know that I would not be able to handle the emotions that I now
know how to deal with.
With the end of this school year coming to a close, my list of to do's is quickly becoming longer and longer. I always have grand plans but never seem to get much of it accomplished. On my list so far:
1. Paint Bedroom
2. Install ceiling fan in bedroom
3. Paint bathroom
4.
It has been a stressful year in that, for a small school of about 350, at least 8 kids have been directly affected by death. They either lost a mother, a father, or a sibling. Kids never cease to amaze me though. They bounce back with a resilience that I no longer posess. I sometimes wish I still had it but know that I would not be able to handle the emotions that I now
know how to deal with.
With the end of this school year coming to a close, my list of to do's is quickly becoming longer and longer. I always have grand plans but never seem to get much of it accomplished. On my list so far:
1. Paint Bedroom
2. Install ceiling fan in bedroom
3. Paint bathroom
4.
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