Ted Fryers....

It's the place to be. I swear I can smell them from I-5 the minute we hit the Oregon state line. I start to feel that giddy feeling in the pit of my stomach like the first time I "met" Ken. I daydream for hours about what great sale I am going to run into. I tell ya, to me, that place is almost as exciting as a jar of Nutella with a big spoon sitting in it, waiting for me to scoop it out and shovel it in my mouth, barely taking time to breathe. Yes, this place is that good. It would be the best if it had Nutella jars attached to each cart, with a spoon, and a bag of tortillas to spread it on. The only thing to make it better? Some gorgeous Prince feeding it to me, while admiring my beauty. Ahhhh....

I will admit, at times, I have a bit of a shopping addiction. It's part in due to living in the middle of pine tree/manzaneta infested clump of land, where in all honesty, my best shopping happens at Ben Franklin or Rite Aid...and, only happens about three times a year out of pure desperation and the need for some obscene plastic bag rustling in my palms of my hands, filled with some cheap tacky item that I wouldn't even give to the local "Save the Garbage Cans" fundraising garage sale. In fact, I usually scan the store, darting in and out of aisles, making sure noone I have tried to impress with my "Suitcasing" or "Cow Tipping" stories from my younger years is within view of my purchases. After all, I am cool to them. Anyway, back to my story....So, while it may seem like I am an addict, I am a selective addict and usually only when we travel. I save my addiction for the road. And, honestly, I think the anticipation of quenching that thirst makes it even better. Thankfully Hubs is very tolerant and values the idea of no temper tantrums so is very helpful in helping me find these sacred places to keep me quiet.

I am pretty sure my mental map could name every store between the Oregon I-5 and somewhere in Washington. I'm being totally serious when I say those stores are drawn to us. Traveling at 65+ miles and hour should prohibit the eyesight from certain buildings but NEVER has it denied us the opportunity to find and enter one of these beloved stores.

Sales. Every single time we enter, sales are everywhere. No matter what I carefully place in my cart, it's on sale. AND the best part? For some crazy reason, they usually take off an extra 10-20%, totally justifying every purchase I've made. I recently picked up a pair of flipflops to add to my collection of summer attire. While they had been seriously slashed in price already, when adding them to my cart, a sweet little lady comes and informs me that they are an additional 20% off. I, without a doubt, know those thongs, errrr flipflops, were meant for me. And, to make it even a better day (Minus the Nutella), I found three more pairs in different styles/colors all within easy reach. I'll tell ya, it was meant to be.

While Hubs gently reminded me that we had come in to buy sheets for our bed since we have to buy them somewhere besides CA....We have an Eastern King not a California King....so, we're banned from buying them in CA. Don't get me started on this one. Anyway, I found sheets that were on sale from $99 down to $68 and some change. Then to add to this madness, there were coupons for another 20% OFF. Are you kidding me? So, to make use of this sale, I picked up two king sets and one queen set. I mean they were almost paying me to take them. I felt very justified in buying the shoes as I had saved so much already. I tell ya, I would live in this store if I could....promoting their greatness 24 hours a day. Oh, and they have a full on grocery store there as well. Ohhhh, I can hardly breath after talking about it.....

So, while I am very vocal about promoting this store...I am, however, hesitant to truthfully identify it. While I want everyone to be able to take advantage of this sale infested wonderland, I'm worried that there will be nothing left for me when I finally make my monthy pilgrimage there. However, I'd probably share my secret for giftcards or cash of which I would dedicate to purchases made in that store. I'm just saying....

Fred Meyers....
You are my favorite place to shop
My dreams of you never stop.
You never fail me on sales
from clothes to pillows to hair gel.
My dream job is to be a Freddy's Greeter,
just wish the toy aisle was a little neater.
I dream about you day and night,
I'm glad you don't sell animals that bite.
Your grocery store is an absolute dream
where you sell everything from prunes to cream.
Socks, face paint, towels, and more....
You truly are my dream store!!