Last night we attended a wedding of one of DH's former advisement students. This class had an amazing group of young men that DH became extremely close to and has stayed in contact with. This was one of the first ones to take the plunge.
This wedding was held on a ranch a few miles out of town. I had been out there once before when DH and I were dating. I really had no idea what to expect until I got out there and realized this event was going to be a lot grander than I was picturing. We got out there a bit early and were able to park by the barns but most people had to park in the back 40, in hay fields, and then hop on a hay wagon pulled by a four wheeler. Since we parked closer to the event, we had to track through dirt and mud to get to the wedding site. After all, we were on a ranch!
The wedding took place in a big open grassy field area, overlooking a little pond and the mountains. It was absolutely beautiful! Trees and flowers were everywhere and the temperature was perfect--in the mid 80's. It is still very smoky here so there weren't blue skies but that didn't take away from the calm, peaceful feeling you got there.
After the wedding, we all grabbed our chairs and headed up the road , past the port-a-potties, to the covered hay barn where they had set up tables and the catered food wagons were waiting to serve us. The food was amazing, with free flowing beer, wine, champagne, bottled water, etc. The company was great too! It seems like funerals and weddings are great places to reconnect with people--too bad we can't find more everyday time to be with the people we got to see.
When I say that this is the biggest wedding I have ever been to, I am in no way exaggerating! There were about 400 people there, a lot of them wealthy ranchers and farmers from the outlying areas. I always joke with my husband regarding social events in this area. There is no set dress code. There will always be people in shorts, jeans, dress casual, formal, or "other" attire which means that you will fit in, no matter what you wear. Strangely, several times I have worn a dress to a wedding or funeral and felt very over dressed. It's weird.
Anyway, it got me thinking about our wedding six years ago. A huge, social event was the last thing on my mind. We were both older--30's--and very established in our homes. We really didn't need much to set up house. So, for us, our wedding was something very intimate and small. DH had also been extremely ill, hospitalized, and near death and for us, the only thing we wanted was to be together...forever....and not have to travel back and forth between CA and OR.
You see, when I have to be in front of a crowd of people, it is not a good thing. My stomach is in knots, I sweat, shake, and my face turns bright red. Never fails that I get diarrhea (Too much info, I know!) and I am a nervous wreck. So, anyway, when DH suggested that we take the next available school vacation and head to Lake Tahoe, I couldn't have loved that man anymore.
When he came up to visit for Valentines Weekend, we went and picked out a ring, got engaged, and planned a wedding ALL IN ONE WEEKEND! Lucky for us, DH happened to be talking to a fellow teacher who was also engaged to get married. She told him about Harvey's in Lake Tahoe and showed him the wedding chapel. It was perfect for us and allowed us to pick and choose the package we wanted and the number of people we wanted attending. Our package allowed 30 people (which was actually more than I would have opted for) and in the end we had 27 plus ourselves there.
Our wedding was beautiful and perfect for us. I am sure our parents would have preferred a church wedding but us becoming husband and wife was what was important, not where it took place. After our ceremony, we had exactly 1/2 hour with the photographer (that's what our package "said") and he amazingly got some very good photos. We then had a couple of hours to hang out before our dinner. I remember so perfectly, walking up to our suite to change clothes so we could head to dinner. I looked at my husband and was so filled with love and peace for this man that I had just said "I do" to. It was such a surreal moment and, honestly one I didn't know if I would ever experience.
Our wedding dinner was held at "The Chart House", a steak and seafood restaurant sitting above Lake Tahoe on the hillside. We were able to reserve the back room which was a beautiful room with floor to ceiling windows facing the lake. We were able to pick out the food selections before hand and they had very nice menu cards placed at each setting. We had several waitresses and waiters who catered to our every demand and they did a great job as well. As we were eating and visiting, we got to watch the sun set over Lake Tahoe. It was absolutely amazing!
I guess my point is, no matter how big or how small, a wedding is a wonderful thing! For us, it was all about us and our day and that is why we chose to celebrate with just a few of our friends and family. For others, hundreds of people complete their wedding day.
This I know---I love the man I married. No matter where, no matter how, I am the happiest woman alive and married to the most perfect man for me. I hope me knows how happy he has made me. Sweetie, I love you!
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
No regrets...
My parents and Bear were able to make the two hour journey to attend Steve's funeral. It was a graveside service with many people attending, which solidifies the influence Steve had on the lives of many. Bear was visibly upset, but was very comforted when he arrived and spotted Karen Ann right away--a friend, fellow classmate, and leader to him. She had previously worked at the Workshop he now attends and works at and has always been a real friend to him. My mom said he was instantly drawn to her and left their side to be with her through the service. At one point, my mom looked over and Karen Ann had her arm around Bear. That was the one thing that sustained him through the service.
It is so hard to know how he truly feels in a situation like this. However, both of my parents said it was very evident that he was deeply affected by this. While driving to the service, he kept telling them that he was sad---my guess is that this was his way of saying he needed to be comforted as well. After the service was over and they got in the car, Bear said over and over, "Karen Ann put her arm around me." For him, that was the one thing that anyone could have done to help him get through the pain he was feeling at the time. In my heart too, I think maybe Karen Ann was comforted by Bear as well. Thank You Karen Ann for being there for Bear!
After writing about this experience, I have recieved several emails and calls. I am amazed at the people that have found out about these posts and am also very touched by the ones who have passed it on to others. Thank you for sharing this---I already know how special these guys are but love that everyone else is getting to know and fall in love with them as well.
If you ever get the chance to attend or volunteer with Special Olympics, I so urge you to do so. You will never regret spending time with these amazing athletes and heroes. You will never regret giving and getting hugs. You will never regret clapping and cheering harder than you ever have in your whole life. You will never regret the tears you shed that day (tears of joy and pure amazement at what you are able to be a part of). You will never regret falling in love with complete strangers who are tugging at your heart strings so hard, you have to consciously keep yourself in your seat. But most of all, you will never regret the lessons you learn that day from people who will touch your lives forever. You will never have any regrets about being a part of Special Olympics!
It is so hard to know how he truly feels in a situation like this. However, both of my parents said it was very evident that he was deeply affected by this. While driving to the service, he kept telling them that he was sad---my guess is that this was his way of saying he needed to be comforted as well. After the service was over and they got in the car, Bear said over and over, "Karen Ann put her arm around me." For him, that was the one thing that anyone could have done to help him get through the pain he was feeling at the time. In my heart too, I think maybe Karen Ann was comforted by Bear as well. Thank You Karen Ann for being there for Bear!
After writing about this experience, I have recieved several emails and calls. I am amazed at the people that have found out about these posts and am also very touched by the ones who have passed it on to others. Thank you for sharing this---I already know how special these guys are but love that everyone else is getting to know and fall in love with them as well.
If you ever get the chance to attend or volunteer with Special Olympics, I so urge you to do so. You will never regret spending time with these amazing athletes and heroes. You will never regret giving and getting hugs. You will never regret clapping and cheering harder than you ever have in your whole life. You will never regret the tears you shed that day (tears of joy and pure amazement at what you are able to be a part of). You will never regret falling in love with complete strangers who are tugging at your heart strings so hard, you have to consciously keep yourself in your seat. But most of all, you will never regret the lessons you learn that day from people who will touch your lives forever. You will never have any regrets about being a part of Special Olympics!
Monday, July 14, 2008
tag....I am it!
Someone sent this to me via email so I am going to try it on my blog here.
1. 4 jobs I've had :
Intstructional Assistant for physically and mentally challenged children
Slave for a Group Home for Mentally Challenged Male Sex Offenders
Clerk at Video Store
Nanny on Long Island for a newborn for two years
2. 4 movies I can watch over and over
Sweet Home Alabama
Overboard
Sixteen Candles
Dumb and Dumber (and I laugh harder each time I watch it!)
3. 4 places I have lived:
Ontario, OR --Don't get too excited....Ontario....WooHoo~
Great Neck, NY--Nanny for two years
Vale, OR--Grew up here...enough said
Juntura, OR--I don't remember living here. This was my first home with my parents and we moved after the school year was over for my Dad.
4. 4 favorite TV shows:
Survivor
WipeOut
Adoption Story
Amazing Race
5. 4 Places I've been:
Niagra Falls
Maui, Hawaii
Las Vegas, NV
NYC, NY
6. 4 Favorite foods:
Veggie Delight Sandwich from Subway
Any sort of seafood
Scarface Pasta from DiChicos in Fresno
Tacos
7. 4 websites I visit daily:
Two Peas in A Bucket
Etsy.com
Cnn.com
Various blogs
8. 4 Places I'd rather be:
Bandon, OR
A Cruise (Which will happen in a year-WooHoo!)
Visiting friends and family in OR/ID
Back in Hawaii sipping pina coladas
4 Blog buddies I want to tag:
Surprise me....
1. 4 jobs I've had :
Intstructional Assistant for physically and mentally challenged children
Slave for a Group Home for Mentally Challenged Male Sex Offenders
Clerk at Video Store
Nanny on Long Island for a newborn for two years
2. 4 movies I can watch over and over
Sweet Home Alabama
Overboard
Sixteen Candles
Dumb and Dumber (and I laugh harder each time I watch it!)
3. 4 places I have lived:
Ontario, OR --Don't get too excited....Ontario....WooHoo~
Great Neck, NY--Nanny for two years
Vale, OR--Grew up here...enough said
Juntura, OR--I don't remember living here. This was my first home with my parents and we moved after the school year was over for my Dad.
4. 4 favorite TV shows:
Survivor
WipeOut
Adoption Story
Amazing Race
5. 4 Places I've been:
Niagra Falls
Maui, Hawaii
Las Vegas, NV
NYC, NY
6. 4 Favorite foods:
Veggie Delight Sandwich from Subway
Any sort of seafood
Scarface Pasta from DiChicos in Fresno
Tacos
7. 4 websites I visit daily:
Two Peas in A Bucket
Etsy.com
Cnn.com
Various blogs
8. 4 Places I'd rather be:
Bandon, OR
A Cruise (Which will happen in a year-WooHoo!)
Visiting friends and family in OR/ID
Back in Hawaii sipping pina coladas
4 Blog buddies I want to tag:
Surprise me....
Hugs
I talked to my Mom yesterday after a restless night. I was concerned that Bear hadn't found out yet that Steve had passed away. Since my Mom hadn't heard for Bear, we assumed that he didn't know yet. Our assumption was correct.
Bear called later to fill my parents in. He was devastated as I suspected he would be. He repeatedly told my Mom that he just needed a hug. My heart literally broke for him. Of course he needed a hug, he lost a great friend who he could relate to at such a personal level. If I could have jumped through the phone line I would have hugged him a million times plus one. He so needed to have his family.
My mom decided to go pick him up (he lives in a group home about 20 minutes from them--another post for later) and have him spend the night with them. She and Bear will then drive two hours today to go to Steve's graveside service. When she told me she was doing this, my eyes watered up. What a wonderful way for Bear to be able to say Goodbye, in his own way, to Steve. Today has been a pretty subdued day for me as I so wish I lived closer to them and could have gone with them. I know Steve is in a much better place, swimming his heart out, but he will surely be missed by all he touched.
I am anxious to talk to my Mom tonight to find out how Bear handled the day. It is so hard to know what is going on inside his mind and heart in situations like this. He has such a hard time communicating so his being able to express that he needed hugs was a big thing for him. Because of Bear's disabilities, he is always around others with problems as well. Some of them much worse. For only being 3o years old, he has experienced a lot of death within his circle. Many are not very healthy and are considerably older than him. Two of his housemates are in ill health as well and we know the time is soon for them. I only hope that he can somehow understand all of this and make some sense of it.
I only wish I was closer to hug him. Love ya Bear!
Bear called later to fill my parents in. He was devastated as I suspected he would be. He repeatedly told my Mom that he just needed a hug. My heart literally broke for him. Of course he needed a hug, he lost a great friend who he could relate to at such a personal level. If I could have jumped through the phone line I would have hugged him a million times plus one. He so needed to have his family.
My mom decided to go pick him up (he lives in a group home about 20 minutes from them--another post for later) and have him spend the night with them. She and Bear will then drive two hours today to go to Steve's graveside service. When she told me she was doing this, my eyes watered up. What a wonderful way for Bear to be able to say Goodbye, in his own way, to Steve. Today has been a pretty subdued day for me as I so wish I lived closer to them and could have gone with them. I know Steve is in a much better place, swimming his heart out, but he will surely be missed by all he touched.
I am anxious to talk to my Mom tonight to find out how Bear handled the day. It is so hard to know what is going on inside his mind and heart in situations like this. He has such a hard time communicating so his being able to express that he needed hugs was a big thing for him. Because of Bear's disabilities, he is always around others with problems as well. Some of them much worse. For only being 3o years old, he has experienced a lot of death within his circle. Many are not very healthy and are considerably older than him. Two of his housemates are in ill health as well and we know the time is soon for them. I only hope that he can somehow understand all of this and make some sense of it.
I only wish I was closer to hug him. Love ya Bear!
The Summer List....cont'd
Ok, here is the beginning of my summer list. Strangely, summer is about 1/2 over and it feels like it has just started.
1. Clean out all closets (and hide Dh's stuff before he sees what I am throwing out.)
2. Have a big yardsale (although DH would pay me not to have one)
3. Pick out paint colors for both bathrooms and bedroom
4. Paint bedroom and bathrooms (Enlist help for this (promise pizza and drinks afterwards...doesn't everywork for food?)
5. Finish painting kitchen
6. Pick out new color to paint accents wall in Living Room (Dh hubby could possibly kill me for doing this)
7. Pick out burial plot--see above (TOTALLY just joking!)
8. Help DH clean and organize garage (throw away stuff when he isn't looking!)
9. Go through all Christmas decorations and get rid of what we don't use (don't let DH help--he'd make sure we don't use any!)
10. Organize scrap/craft room(Make path to get into room first!)
11. Donate craft and scrap supplies that I don't want(yeah right, who am I kidding? I want everything in there!)
12. Organize craft patterns and start planning for bazaars
13. Stain front deck
14. Start planning trip for spring break--maybe to NYC ??
15.
Am I for real? Is this all really going to get done? Good grief, even I can figure out the answers to these questions. Oh well, I can dream. And a plan is always good, right? Any helpers volunteering?
Anyhoo, I have a lot to do and not a lot of time. The big wedding is this weekend which will be fun for DH. Lots of his favorite former students will be there that he hasn't seen for quite some time. I am excited for him....
Next Thursday we are headed down south to visit with DH's parents and his brother and family. It should be fun and relaxing. However I don't look forward to the 100+ degree weather there but am thankful that his parents have a pool. Fun times!
The smoke here is unbelievable. We live at the base of a beautiful mountain and for days we have not been able to see it. I am stuffed up every day and just plain not feeling up to par. I am chalking it all up to the smoke playing with my allergies. We are so thankful for all the firefighters that have been working day in and day out to get these fires under control. Their jobs are not fun, especially in the heat and their lives really are on the line. If you see a firefighter, thank them for us.....we really do appreciate them and owe them a lot!
Thankfully for us, we live in town, not directly surrounded by the monsterous pines that so many places around here do have. Last year we had two 100+ feet trees taken out. I feel much better with those gone but sure miss the beauty of them. However we do have several friends living outside the city limits that have been placed on notice or have been evacuated in the past few weeks, due to the fires, and have felt their fear and nervousness as they waited. Thankfully none of them lost their homes but many have. We feel for them and definitely keep them in our thoughts and prayers.
I am off to finish the laundry and then tackle the crap room (I mean scraproom). Wish me luck!
1. Clean out all closets (and hide Dh's stuff before he sees what I am throwing out.)
2. Have a big yardsale (although DH would pay me not to have one)
3. Pick out paint colors for both bathrooms and bedroom
4. Paint bedroom and bathrooms (Enlist help for this (promise pizza and drinks afterwards...doesn't everywork for food?)
5. Finish painting kitchen
6. Pick out new color to paint accents wall in Living Room (Dh hubby could possibly kill me for doing this)
7. Pick out burial plot--see above (TOTALLY just joking!)
8. Help DH clean and organize garage (throw away stuff when he isn't looking!)
9. Go through all Christmas decorations and get rid of what we don't use (don't let DH help--he'd make sure we don't use any!)
10. Organize scrap/craft room(Make path to get into room first!)
11. Donate craft and scrap supplies that I don't want(yeah right, who am I kidding? I want everything in there!)
12. Organize craft patterns and start planning for bazaars
13. Stain front deck
14. Start planning trip for spring break--maybe to NYC ??
15.
Am I for real? Is this all really going to get done? Good grief, even I can figure out the answers to these questions. Oh well, I can dream. And a plan is always good, right? Any helpers volunteering?
Anyhoo, I have a lot to do and not a lot of time. The big wedding is this weekend which will be fun for DH. Lots of his favorite former students will be there that he hasn't seen for quite some time. I am excited for him....
Next Thursday we are headed down south to visit with DH's parents and his brother and family. It should be fun and relaxing. However I don't look forward to the 100+ degree weather there but am thankful that his parents have a pool. Fun times!
The smoke here is unbelievable. We live at the base of a beautiful mountain and for days we have not been able to see it. I am stuffed up every day and just plain not feeling up to par. I am chalking it all up to the smoke playing with my allergies. We are so thankful for all the firefighters that have been working day in and day out to get these fires under control. Their jobs are not fun, especially in the heat and their lives really are on the line. If you see a firefighter, thank them for us.....we really do appreciate them and owe them a lot!
Thankfully for us, we live in town, not directly surrounded by the monsterous pines that so many places around here do have. Last year we had two 100+ feet trees taken out. I feel much better with those gone but sure miss the beauty of them. However we do have several friends living outside the city limits that have been placed on notice or have been evacuated in the past few weeks, due to the fires, and have felt their fear and nervousness as they waited. Thankfully none of them lost their homes but many have. We feel for them and definitely keep them in our thoughts and prayers.
I am off to finish the laundry and then tackle the crap room (I mean scraproom). Wish me luck!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Days of Summer....
The summer to do list is going to have to wait. There are more pressing things to talk about right now.
DH and I just returned from a fun filled 10 day trip to Bandon-By-Sea, Oregon. The sun was out EVERY single day--which we all know is a big WOW on the Oregon Coast. The wind was also out in full force. However, we were able to spend some much needed time together, walk the beach, go for adventurous drives, critique restaurants, and Shop. The last being my favorite!!!!
I think this is the one place we truly look forward to going to each year. It is a place without TV, landline phones, etc. The world seems to go on but we have no idea when or how. It is very relaxing and kind of brings us back to the place we need to be.
Several people in my life (one way or another) have passed away in the past few days. A guy I went to school with was killed (beaten for money after he left a bar) who was only 40 years old. I hope his family is holding up ok and I know the days ahead will be long and painful. I am sure there will be a trial and I can't imagine the pain that will dredge up as well. My heart is with them all.
A few weeks ago, DH and I went to Boise to watch my little brother participate in Special Olympics. For him, this is one of the things that makes life worth living. His self confidence is amazing and he is so proud of himself. We really felt like we needed to support him and when he asked if we were coming, there was no way I could not go.
The olympics were held in a new, state of the art YMCA Facility that blew my socks off. There were several different pools for the participants to swim in, according to their levels and races. As we were all gathered, waiting for the swim walk that Bear was going to participate in, he introduced me to a fellow olympian named Steve. In talking with Steve, we both realized that I had gone to school with his sister-in-law. After that, there was bond between us. He zoned in on that and talked to me every second he could. His mind was amazing, as he could remember everything--dates, names, etc. He and Bear had to race against each other and as the race ended, Bear turned around, waited for Steve and high fived him.
This is why I love them! No matter who wins, no matter who fails, they are there for each other! It didn't matter who won, they were both so incredibly proud of themselves and each other. As they exited the pool, they put their arms around each other and told each other what a great job the other had done in their own language. I have a picture to prove it!
I admit, I got teary eyed watching it and realized then that they aren't the one with "problems"--we are. They have it all figured out. We don't. They know the right way to live. They know the right things to say. And they do it without hesitation. I was amazed at the lessons I learned by watching these olympians, these heroes. I realized that life should be seen as they see it. Our view is way too clouded. Way too junked up. Their view is as clear as can be.
After their races, we all went outside for the medal ceremony. I was so in awe, I could not even speak. I stood in amazement and watched every single olympian, whether they had won or not, absolutely grin from ear to ear at their medal and even bigger at each of their opponent's medals. I watched them help each other up to the podium and help each other down. I watched them cheer louder for their competitors than themselves. I watched them look at their competitors medals, and when realizing they were on backwards, gently lift it off and place it on correctly. I realized I am absolutely in love with Bear and so thankful that he is a part of our lives. I realized all the lessons I was being taught that day....
Fast forward to tonight. I was checking the news, etc. on the computer and decided to check in on my old hometown newspaper. Much to my shock, I had to see and read Steve's obituary. Only a couple of weeks ago he was so full of life and never in a million years would dream that I was going to be reading his obit. My heart sank. My eyes watered and I struggled to try and figure out why I was feeling so distraught. I realized my pain was for Bear. I realized that this will be devastating for him. I realized that I will feel a connection to this story when he tells me about Steve passing, about how he will miss him because he was his best friend, and about how he is sad. I realized I am sad too. Steve, thank you for everything you taught me that Sat. morning. You taught me more than you will ever know.
After getting over that shock, I looked down and saw one more name in the obituaries. Barbara and I worked together at OHS as Special Education Assistants. She was much older than me, almost like a grandmother figure. She was a very beautiful, opinionated, and overly organized woman who absolutely loved the children she worked with. Every day she came to school looking so pretty and put together and ready to go. I always admired that about her.
Several years after I left, she started working with my Mom at school. My mom talked about her and kept her informed about what I was doing. When DH and I got married, Barbara was unable to come to our reception due to having surgery, but sent us a very nice waffle iron. It has been used a lot and I always think of her when I use it. It was one of those gifts that I was so touched by as I was not expecting to hear from her and was so surprised when Mom gave it to me.
Anyway, I know that she had been struggling with some health issues over the years and only hope that she wasn't suffering much before she passed away. I hope that someone was with her to hold her hand and tell her they loved her. I am not sure she heard that a lot. I hope that she didn't die alone. I hope she can read this and know that her friendship really meant a lot to me. When there were some big issues going on at the school, she was one of the few that was able to help me through it. I hope she knows how thankful I was for her at that time.
Barbara, even though I hadn't talked to you in a long time, I missed you and love you and hope that you are now running without pain and playing with your puppies. Til we meet again....
DH and I just returned from a fun filled 10 day trip to Bandon-By-Sea, Oregon. The sun was out EVERY single day--which we all know is a big WOW on the Oregon Coast. The wind was also out in full force. However, we were able to spend some much needed time together, walk the beach, go for adventurous drives, critique restaurants, and Shop. The last being my favorite!!!!
I think this is the one place we truly look forward to going to each year. It is a place without TV, landline phones, etc. The world seems to go on but we have no idea when or how. It is very relaxing and kind of brings us back to the place we need to be.
Several people in my life (one way or another) have passed away in the past few days. A guy I went to school with was killed (beaten for money after he left a bar) who was only 40 years old. I hope his family is holding up ok and I know the days ahead will be long and painful. I am sure there will be a trial and I can't imagine the pain that will dredge up as well. My heart is with them all.
A few weeks ago, DH and I went to Boise to watch my little brother participate in Special Olympics. For him, this is one of the things that makes life worth living. His self confidence is amazing and he is so proud of himself. We really felt like we needed to support him and when he asked if we were coming, there was no way I could not go.
The olympics were held in a new, state of the art YMCA Facility that blew my socks off. There were several different pools for the participants to swim in, according to their levels and races. As we were all gathered, waiting for the swim walk that Bear was going to participate in, he introduced me to a fellow olympian named Steve. In talking with Steve, we both realized that I had gone to school with his sister-in-law. After that, there was bond between us. He zoned in on that and talked to me every second he could. His mind was amazing, as he could remember everything--dates, names, etc. He and Bear had to race against each other and as the race ended, Bear turned around, waited for Steve and high fived him.
This is why I love them! No matter who wins, no matter who fails, they are there for each other! It didn't matter who won, they were both so incredibly proud of themselves and each other. As they exited the pool, they put their arms around each other and told each other what a great job the other had done in their own language. I have a picture to prove it!
I admit, I got teary eyed watching it and realized then that they aren't the one with "problems"--we are. They have it all figured out. We don't. They know the right way to live. They know the right things to say. And they do it without hesitation. I was amazed at the lessons I learned by watching these olympians, these heroes. I realized that life should be seen as they see it. Our view is way too clouded. Way too junked up. Their view is as clear as can be.
After their races, we all went outside for the medal ceremony. I was so in awe, I could not even speak. I stood in amazement and watched every single olympian, whether they had won or not, absolutely grin from ear to ear at their medal and even bigger at each of their opponent's medals. I watched them help each other up to the podium and help each other down. I watched them cheer louder for their competitors than themselves. I watched them look at their competitors medals, and when realizing they were on backwards, gently lift it off and place it on correctly. I realized I am absolutely in love with Bear and so thankful that he is a part of our lives. I realized all the lessons I was being taught that day....
Fast forward to tonight. I was checking the news, etc. on the computer and decided to check in on my old hometown newspaper. Much to my shock, I had to see and read Steve's obituary. Only a couple of weeks ago he was so full of life and never in a million years would dream that I was going to be reading his obit. My heart sank. My eyes watered and I struggled to try and figure out why I was feeling so distraught. I realized my pain was for Bear. I realized that this will be devastating for him. I realized that I will feel a connection to this story when he tells me about Steve passing, about how he will miss him because he was his best friend, and about how he is sad. I realized I am sad too. Steve, thank you for everything you taught me that Sat. morning. You taught me more than you will ever know.
After getting over that shock, I looked down and saw one more name in the obituaries. Barbara and I worked together at OHS as Special Education Assistants. She was much older than me, almost like a grandmother figure. She was a very beautiful, opinionated, and overly organized woman who absolutely loved the children she worked with. Every day she came to school looking so pretty and put together and ready to go. I always admired that about her.
Several years after I left, she started working with my Mom at school. My mom talked about her and kept her informed about what I was doing. When DH and I got married, Barbara was unable to come to our reception due to having surgery, but sent us a very nice waffle iron. It has been used a lot and I always think of her when I use it. It was one of those gifts that I was so touched by as I was not expecting to hear from her and was so surprised when Mom gave it to me.
Anyway, I know that she had been struggling with some health issues over the years and only hope that she wasn't suffering much before she passed away. I hope that someone was with her to hold her hand and tell her they loved her. I am not sure she heard that a lot. I hope that she didn't die alone. I hope she can read this and know that her friendship really meant a lot to me. When there were some big issues going on at the school, she was one of the few that was able to help me through it. I hope she knows how thankful I was for her at that time.
Barbara, even though I hadn't talked to you in a long time, I missed you and love you and hope that you are now running without pain and playing with your puppies. Til we meet again....
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